Monday, September 3, 2018

Understanding Others

This summer has taught me many important life lessons, and I am grateful for every lesson/challenge/experience. I also hold a huge amount of gratitude in my heart for the people who crossed my path and helped me to learn and grow. We really are a product of the people and experiences that we face and the way we develop and grow is by moving through these moments that shape and change us.

I had one of those "deep and meaningful" conversations last night with a dear friend and we were discussing our own minds and the minds of others. (You know, sounds like completely normal Sunday night conversation! haha...) I have been reading a book by Nicholas Epley called "Mindwise: Why We Misunderstand What Others Think, Believe, Feel, and Want". This book focuses a lot on the theory of Egocentrism and how we often misunderstand others based on our own perceptions.

For me the take-home message was to recall and to understand that we are all on some level the same. We all struggle, we are all seeking, we all ultimately want to be happy and at peace in our lives. Finding that place of shared-humanness where you can recognize this in another person is how you move past the Ego. Naturally our Ego causes us to believe that we somehow are better than another, or don't struggle as much as the next person, or that we are more responsible, or more skilled, or simply MORE.....Living in humility means that you come to a place where you are "nobody" special. Where you acknowledge that you are just like everyone else. This is a huge life lesson to grasp.

One great outcome of our conversation last night was that we both realized how important these conversations are to have. (And challenged ourselves both to have them more often with more people.) To self-reflect and to have someone to talk to on such a deep level where you can hear other ideas and perspectives. It is important to surround yourself with people who build you up and challenge your thoughts and allow you to learn and grow. In our society a lot of people shy away from these deep conversations, so it's not always easy to find someone whom you can trust well enough to talk about the "real" stuff with. Equally it takes a certain level of trust to open yourself up to these conversations and to connect on such a level with someone else.

So, I encourage you today - take the time to have some real conversations....Take the time to dig a little deeper into your own thoughts and to do some self-reflection. Remember that when you think you understand another person and you think you have them all figured out - you don't! haha....😉 You are only seeing them from your own mind's eye.

"May I see in another person today myself - that we are the same; we are one." ~ Namaste