From The Inside Out

Bring On Third Year

2012-01-28T21:14:00.000-08:00

Well, this week is the official start to my third - and final - year of University. I will (Lord willing) graduate in 9 short months and get my practicing certificate as a Registered Nurse!

For me, these next 9 months will be much like being pregnant. There will be LOTS of growing pains, nausea, stress, anxiety, excitement, anticipation...you name it...We will consider the state finals my "labour" and the practicing certificate my "baby". While some people really enjoy being pregnant, others suffer through day by day just to glory in the final result.

I draw this comparison because nearly every one of my friends has recently (or is presently) going through their own REAL pregnancies. I can only relate on this level....haha

So, yes, school starts this week. I am looking forward to getting back at it - but to be honest I have been doing a bit of research and study these past three weeks as well in preparation - turns out I may be a bit of a nerd!

My running is going well - up to 10K now, so getting much closer - I am still training for my half-marathon, but have been working nights the past two weeks which has thrown a bit of a curve ball to my schedule. I am being flexible and recognising that all is not lost. Tuesday night is the Super 7 Series that the Manawatu Striders put on each year, so I'm excited to participate in that. This will be my first race in well over a year. (7K race)

The sugar detox went really well. I definitely feel much healthier and better. I have also been making some significant changes to my diet incorporating more grains and legumes into my daily diet. I was getting into a bit of a fix just eating salad and green smoothies and realised that I had unintentionally reduced my intake of protein and grains. I decided to give my diet a bit of an overhaul and change things up a bit. I have been trying some great new vegetarian recipes lately as well, and really enjoying the change.

Have you made any significant changes to your lifestlye in 2012?

Change starts today!

Sugar Addict

2011-12-26T14:40:00.000-08:00

Hi, my name is Teniah, and I am addicted to sugar.

In all seriousness, I believe that sugar is actually highly addictive due to the pleasure pathways in the brain that it triggers, and should be treated as such. About a year ago I started doing a little baking here and there and re-introducing sugar into my life. Gradually it went from the occasional indulgence of chocolate during exams to eating chocolate every time I would get stressed (which is a lot of chocolate! haha). We never used to keep goodies in the house before...

While I would say I still only eat sweets occasionally and hardly ever buy ice cream or goodies for the house, over the past few months that has been changing. (No help from all my Christmas baking!) I began baking when we moved out to Masterton and I actually had time to bake. I have really enjoyed making goodies to have in the evenings and fresh bread and other indulgences. The trouble is, that instead of it being an occasional thing, it has become a regular nighttime habit now - a cuppa tea and rhubarb bread or a cookie...and so the pattern starts.

This is definitely not the path I want to take. I do not want to be addicted to sugar and crave sweets and foods that make me feel lousy and irritable. I do not want to develop diabetes (which runs in my family) or put on excess weight. On top of that, all of my running training is a bit pointless if I am fueling my body with all the wrong things. - Which I have noticed that some days I just don't have the energy I need for a long run...likely due to the sugar eaten that day.

So, I have made a decision to fight my addiction and give up sugar cold-turkey. (Obviously not forever) I believe that you can have a treat every now and then, but for the next month I am giving up sugar to re-set my system and head into the new year feeling good. I want to detox my body and just be really healthy again. I would say that this is a New Year's Resolution, but in reality, it's more that I am just ready to make a commitment to overhauling my current intake of sugar and changing how I view the food that fuel's my body.

Mantra: "Change starts right where you are at today." ~ Namaste

Making Choices

2011-12-08T13:20:00.000-08:00

It can often be said when people are faced with difficult choices to make in their lives that you should "follow your heart" and that your heart will lead you down the path that is right for you...

Is that true? Does the heart always lead you to happiness?

I would step out on a limb and say that "no", the heart does not always lead you to happiness right away...When you follow your heart and trust that it is leading you down the right path, you may find in actual fact, that it has lead you to sorrow and pain. I believe eventually that pain turns to joy and in the end your heart will truly have lead you to happiness (it's just a long time coming in some situations).

Life can be so confusing like that...Needing to make a choice around where your future will take you, or who you will enter a relationship with, or when the right time is for those relationships...It's hard to say if the choices that you make will lead to pain or joy. Isn't that life, though?

I guess what I am most thinking about today is the truth in that statement to "follow your heart"...Does the heart lead you down the right path, or can the heart deceive you? And in the end, will you come out at the same place?

In my own life, my heart has always lead me straight. It may have required that I go through pain along the way, but it ended in happiness. I believe that I can trust my heart, I just need to have the courage to do it.

Mantra: "Follow your heart wherever it leads you, for even if the path brings pain, that pain will reveal joy in the end." ~ Namaste

Enjoying Life in the Country

2011-12-04T11:23:00.000-08:00

One of the best parts about living in the country is that on a beautiful evening you can go across the road and walk up the hill and look out over the Wairarapa region...
It's just lovely here. Lots of rolling hills, lots of green land and happy sheep and cows grazing...
If you look closely on the right you can see the property where we are renting at the moment...
With all this lovely area, however, comes a new disappointing twist - Allergies! - I am suffering terribly at the moment with all the thistle and stuff floating around in the air. It's a real shame because it definitely takes away from the beauty of the moment. I am trying various remedies, but so far, pretty much unsuccessful. This has definitely put a damper on my motivation to run/train at the moment. I am still doing it, but it's a hard sacrifice as it usually leaves me sneezing the rest of the afternoon. Shame...I am soon hoping to fine a good treatment option.

On the up-side of things, as soon as we leave the area it seems to clear up quite quickly, so tramping is a great relief. I have really been enjoying all of our weekend tramps. I will have heaps of time for my training as it gets closer to the race, so I'm not too worried about that, but hope to just keep a moderate running routine so I can get stronger and stronger during the summer.

Overall I have had an amazing summer so far which has proven to rejuvenate me and I am already feeling more prepared to cope with the challenges of next year. Just trying to really set up some good routines now while I have the time. Remembering that it takes about 40 days to really establish a true habit.

Mantra: "Today is the first day of the rest of your life - let today be the day you make positive change." ~ Namaste

2011-11-28T11:08:00.000-08:00

Around our house there are lots of Pukeku. These two in particular appear to be contemplating building a nest in front of our house. Every night we watch them around the same time come over and peck around in the grassy mound out front. They are seriously odd looking birds, but so pretty in their own right.

Watching these birds reminds me how beautiful uniqueness is. The world would be such a boring place if everyone looked/acted the same, and if all the animals were exactly alike. When you come across an interesting animal with a unique look or personality, it reminds you that the world is so diverse and fascinating.

I think many people struggle with embracing their uniqueness. Our society pushes the idea of conformity - wearing the same styles, the same make up, the same hair color/style, being the same size etc...Those that are different often stand apart as "weird" or "odd" and are often times avoided. What's up with that? Why is it that we encourage conformity? Why are we, as a society, so insecure in our own form? What does it take to become confident in your own unique attributes and characteristics? These are just some musings...

As I get older I am becoming more and more happy with who I am and okay with the fact that I will never "conform" to the ideal "in" group. I will never be skinny, or tan, or stylish in the way that society dictates that beauty should be...But, I will be exactly who I am. I am learning more and more every day that I want to be me. I don't want to conform, I don't want to try and be something that I am not. I am happy to stand aside and be the Pukeku who just is what it is....

Mantra: "Inside each of us is a unique individual waiting to shine: Be exactly who you are" ~ Namaste

Serenity

2011-11-01T11:01:00.000-07:00

It's not always easy to find solitude and refreshment in our busy world, however, if you can get away from the hustle and bustle of the city for a moment and walk among the trees, listening to the birds singing, you can truly get a tiny taste of what serenity actually is.

About a week ago, Travis and I moved to Masterton. We are renting an amazing little house about 10k out of town in the country. It has proven to provide me with much relaxation and recuperation - exactly what I needed.

There is something therapeutic about living in the country, listening to the bees hum and the birds sing. Watching the gentle rain nourish the green grass. It is so energizing to be surrounded by fresh green and cool air. I honestly cannot describe it.

So, yes, I am feeling much more encouraged and uplifted and getting ready for summer holidays. I sat my first exam yesterday and have two more to come. Then, it's holiday time!!! I have been very blessed to have landed a casual job with a new mental health service provider in Masterton, so I am looking forward to working with their team in the near future. However, most of the summer I am planning to just enjoy being home.

I got some art supplies this week and have started a new painting and I have also really been enjoying cooking a lot and using all my lovely fresh herbs. It is a different way of life out here, and one that I am happily getting used to!

The picture above was taken from my porch this morning as I had my coffee - can't get much better than this!!

Mantra: "Let the beauty of the moment nourish your soul" ~ Namaste

Still, Quiet, Peace

2011-09-25T13:11:00.001-07:00

We spent the night near Castle Point to just have a little getaway from the world and to relax and recover from all we have had going on...

This was the perfect setting to just really embrace the beauty of the moment and to let the calm of the ocean just melt away any residual stress or anxiety.

At night the sky was clear and the stars were so incredibly bright - we could even see the milky way!

I am really enjoying getting back into my yoga, swimming, and running. This has allowed me a good opportunity for stress relief and to just reflect on what I want to gain from my life. My stress level has decreased tremendously of late, and I just feel so much healthier and more relaxed.

My goal at the moment is to just really embrace each day and find some joy and time to rest. I am making it a point to do something that I love every day and to make time for myself. I am also planning to really get back into my running over the summer holidays and perhaps even run a few races next year.

Mantra: "Today is your opportunity to embrace life and find joy in the present moment; don't put it off until tomorrow" ~ Namaste

Finding Joy in the Journey

2011-08-20T15:26:00.001-07:00

Recognizing that it is not enough to just enjoy the end result and the final destination....One must find pleasure in the journey along the way...I am seeking to do just that: Find Joy in the Journey

Sometimes I get caught up in looking at the end result and viewing each day as merely a step closer to that goal. Sometimes I say to myself, "well, when this semester is over....when this year is finished...when I finish this...." etc....I sometimes get so focused on what I need to accomplish and what my life will be like AFTER that goal has been met, that I forget to enjoy the journey along the way.

My first week of placements was awesome. I am really enjoying working with the team of nurses out in Horowhenua and the work they are doing in the community is really inspiring. It's been a great opportunity to be refreshed and encouraged to continue on....

I am feeling much more enthusiastic about my studies and feel like I have a bit of renewed passion working with this team...Also, I got my results back from my pharmacology mid-term and I had done really well with that so it encouraged me that all of the hard work I put in does occasionally pay off! This was definitely what I needed to help keep me focused and dedicated to this semester.

Overall, the week has been really good and I am feeling much more centered. I have been swimming a few times and gradually getting back into my yoga again so that has also helped.

Mantra: "Take time to find joy in this present moment - not waiting for what will bring you joy in the future" ~ Namaste

Overcoming Burnout

2011-08-13T21:36:00.000-07:00

We all know and recognize that life is a journey - full of experiences and lessons that we learn from every day. And, yes, we all know that part of that journey includes surviving the deep, dark valleys and making it through to stand on top of the mountains.

So, my current goal...Make it to the top of the next mountain!!

How will I get there?...Survive the deep, dark valley...

I am recovering, at the moment, from the flu. Unfortunately, my immune system apparently got tired of fighting for me and gave in. On the bright side, it forced me to take two days off work - which gave me my first break in ages!! (Not exactly the kind of break I wanted, though...)

This has proven the point that if you don't take care of yourself and you don't find ways to relieve your stress, it will indeed control you.

The process of studying and working has proven to be a major challenge for me in regards to finding balance in my life. I have, very obviously, not mastered this challenge yet! haha. I guess that just goes to show that I am human, just like the next person, and I still have struggles and challenges that I need to faithfully work towards overcoming.

So, I am going to make some very specific changes to my daily schedule with the attempt to get back on track and not let the stress of school/work push me to the edge of burnout. Looking ahead to next year I realize that, in actual fact, my schedule will not let up. While next year may be a bit more fun, the course planned for us is unrelenting and there are very few breaks on the schedule. So...I must find a way to overcome and find peace and enjoyment every day.

Some changes that I want to make for myself: Daily yoga/meditation, Listen to music, Use some daily affirmations, Take more breaks and only study a subject for two hours at a time, Schedule "time out" every single day!, Devote time to exercise at least three days a week, Get regular back massages, Avoid obsessing over grades.

Now, obviously saying these things doesn't actually accomplish them...So, I am hoping that good friends, like you, will help to hold me accountable to these commitments.

It's really about living life to the fullest and finding peace in the midst of chaos...

Mantra: "Don't just verbally commit yourself, but back-up your words with actions - Allow for peace in this present moment." ~ Namaste

Whatumanawa

2011-07-26T11:43:00.000-07:00

I am new to Maori culture as I have only lived in New Zealand for two years, but one thing I have been learning about a lot in my nursing studies are the various Maori health models that are used to promote wellness within the whole person.

Last year I fell in love with the model of Te Whare Tapa Wha which was the concept of a house and each wall of the house represents a various dimension of a person's life which will inevitably impact on their health. In order to have complete health/wellbeing there must be balance between these parts (mental/physical/spiritual/family). I have seen in my own life how true this is. When one area gets out of balance your health starts to be impacted.

Anyway, this semester I am focusing on the Te Wheke model which is the concept of an octopus and each of the tentacles and suckers represent something in a person's life which contributes to health. Again, if any of these areas are not strengthened it will impact negatively on the overall wellness.

The concept of Whatumanawa - The open and healthy expression of emotion/understanding emotional development is the area I have been looking at specifically over the past day or so.

I experienced this myself in the past week or so and can directly relate it to this model....Let me explain....I was always raised to be a very positive person and my family's beliefs were around the idea that you never expressed negativity. If you were feeling sad or upset about something then you buried that pain and put a smile on and pretended that everything was okay....I always disagreed with this idea and believed that as humans we all feel (ALL emotions) everyone is living life and therefore we will all go through various times when things are going great, and times when life just kicks us around. I believe it is healthy to express these feelings and acknowledge that you are human.

Having said this, however, does not mean that everyone will know how to deal with your expression of emotion.....I have been under a lot of stress in the past few weeks (not only with school and work, but one of my clients is also at the end stages of cancer so it's been hard watching him in the last days of his life as he is suffering.) This has been wearing on me and, while still remaining positive and looking at the good things that are happening in life as well, I have expressed some of those emotions of exhaustion and stress. Some of my friends have been really supportive and encouraging and have been completely accepting of the fact that I don't always have to be 100% happy in every moment. At the same time, others have immediately shut me down and made comments which reflect that they believe it is entirely inappropriate for me to express anything other than cheerfulness/happiness.....This got me thinking.....What is that all about?

How do I respond when people express their emotions to me? Do I allow them to express their anger; their pain? Do I allow them to share their feelings or do I shut them down immediately by trying to cheer them up? Hummm.......got me thinking...

In most cases your willingness to be vulnerable and express your true feelings is accepted in a safe and supportive environment. (Within your family and close friends). However, on occasion people will become uncomfortable with the idea that you are expressing negative feelings. Those people often verbally "call you out" and try to shut you down. They may say something along the lines of, "Get over yourself", "Get a grip", "Move on", "Cheer Up".....It would seem to me that when such comments are made it is a result of that person being insecure in how to deal with your expression of emotion. This is not your problem, but rather theirs.

I believe that holistically in order to experience wellness you must be able to embrace the Whatumanawa. You must be able to express your feelings and emotions in a safe and supportive environment where you are not judged.

Consider offering that support to someone around you today...When someone tells you they are angry or upset, or depressed, or sad....just listen and allow them the opportunity to express those emotions without judgement. In so doing you will actually be supporting their wellness rather than sending the message that it is not okay to share those feelings.

This has been an interesting observation of mine this week and I love how applicable this health model is to my life. School is going good so far - It's an extremely full on semester, but I think it will be really good - I got my placements for clinicals which will be at a Primary Health Organisation in Horowhenua (no idea what that will be like, but I'm up for anything). All else is going well, and I leave you with the thought today that life is beautiful and what makes it beautiful is that even when their are rains and storms, with that usually comes a rainbow!

Mantra: "Allow yourself to be true to who you are every day - express your true feelings and allow that expression to bring wellness to your life."

Life on the Mend

2011-06-30T11:32:00.000-07:00

Well, I finally finished my semester and what a relief it is to be done! Second year nursing is no joke. They claim that if you survive it then you will be home free from there on out as this year is, by far, the hardest. This puts me halfway through the program so I am stoked about that.

We are in the middle of our winter break here in NZ, so this is allowing me a moment to recover what remains of my sanity and attempt to get my life back together! I have thoroughly enjoyed having the week to organize things and get everything sorted out.

As it is the first of July I have decided this is the most appropriate day to start another yoga streak and attempt to get back my dedication to the practice. I have organized how I will incorporate exercise into my daily schedule and have been going to a few gym classes of late. My desire is to maintain some form of commitment next semester even when things start to fall a part. I kind of let it all go towards the end of the past semester and I really don't want to do that again. It's just not a healthy response to give up your exercise and moments of relaxation - those are the things that should be foundational for getting you through stressful times!

So, this is me attempting to get my life back together and attempting to forget about all that I did not accomplish and all that I "let go" and instead focus on what I will do in the future and where I am at in this moment.

Mantra: "I allow myself to forget about what was before, and focus on the here and now." ~ Namaste

The life of a student

2011-06-07T01:26:00.000-07:00

To say that my life is consumed with books, reading, lectures, training, essays, research, case studies and more is really an understatement. I thought I would simply post a blog to let you all know that life is very real for me right now as are all the struggles that we on a daily basis. The struggle to get out of the warm bed in the cold, early, winter mornings...the struggle to decline that second, third, fourth, fifth cup of coffee to get through the day....the struggle to somehow manage the energy to make a healthy dinner and spend time with your family....the struggle not to judge yourself too harshly when there just wasn't enough time in the day to fit in a good workout (or when there is, but you opt to rest on the couch instead).....yep, the list goes on

So, yes, I have felt the pressures of late....I started a second job while on my clinical placements and in the midst of both jobs and clinicals I also have been completing my St. John training for the volunteer side of my life. It's been a bit of a whirl-wind really. It's all been great, and I am really blessed with the opportunities that have arisen in the past month or so.....But with great opportunities come some sacrifice....

I confess that I haven't run in several weeks now. I have gone to a few classes at the gym but they have been dreadfully sporadic. My yoga practice has also dwindled to a few times a week.....On the up side I have maintained a really healthy diet and even lost a few lbs in the process.

So, my real point in checking in on here is to say that I am every bit as human as the next person and I sometimes let life get in the way of all the positive things I try to achieve in my daily routine......My commitment is to get back on the wagon and get things rolling again in a proper and faithful routine before I start into second semester. I am determined not to let uni control my life! haha......

Mantra: "I will not let life control me, but will accept the challenge of each moment with grace knowing that each moment I have the ability to cope and find peace." ~ Namaste

Faithfulness Comes in Many Forms

2011-04-23T13:29:00.000-07:00

Week five of my challenge was a mixture of things, really. I consider this mixture to merely be a reflection of how faithfulness can come in many forms. While you may not follow your "plan" exactly, you can still be faithful to the end result through staying mindful of your goals.

This is how my week went. It was the first week of placements for me. The challenge of early morning starts and then going to work for a few hours after placements meant that I did not have the time to devote to my running that I expected. However, I still managed a good week with two days at the gym, three long yoga practices as well as my daily yoga routine, and a really nice long hike as well.
This spot on our tramp was so peaceful and we rested here for a few minutes to just take a moment out to reflect on the rejuvenating power of mother earth.

This week many across the world celebrated Earth Day and remembered the need to be mindful of how we are treating our planet. For me, this is important because I find so much rest and calm when I am out in nature. When I go for long tramps with Travis I find that the energy I gain from walking through the rain forest environment is just so rejuvenating to me and I am able to start my week off with a renewed since of energy. We must protect that and support those working in conservation. In New Zealand it is mostly due to the Department of Conservation (DOC) that we even have these track available to us. So, in honor of Earth Day, I just have to say thank you to those working and supporting DOC in New Zealand. Also a special thanks to each and every person who recycles, cares for the earth, and is mindful of how what you do every day impacts our planet.

So, this week has been a reminder to me of what commitment and faithfulness truly is and how sometimes the way we accomplish this may change, but the motivation and outcome remain the same. While I may not have met my specific targets for how many days a week I would run this week, I still stayed faithful to my intention of eating healthy and maintaining a balance of exercise throughout the week.

Mantra: "Let your faithfulness guide you towards the goals you have established for yourself in this present moment." ~ Namaste

Week Four

2011-04-16T13:18:00.001-07:00

This week I have been really faithful to eating healthy and exercising. My exercising did not include the full amount of running and ab work that I planned, but instead involved a lot of cross training. In my opinion, it still counts - especially when most of that involved distance walks - I did, incorporate two long and intense yoga sessions this week along with my normal daily yoga practice. Overall, I consider this week to be a great success.
Catching the sunrise in Napier was the highlight of my week. There is something about a sunrise that rejuvenates the soul reminding you that it's a fresh day.

This week I fit in some good shifts with the St. John ambulance and definitely enjoyed that. While 13 hour night shifts definitely tire you out for the following day, it is well worth the sacrifice for the experience gained. I am looking forward to more of this, as my official recruitment day is the 30th of April.

Travis and I did a lovely tramp around Cape Kidnappers yesterday and I think that is just what I needed before beginning my first week of placements tomorrow. My goal this week is to maintain my exercise routine even in the midst of the challenging schedule ahead of me. I am also committing to taking my lunch every day and packing a healthy snack so that I am not tempted to eat unhealthy things. The goal this week, I think is to keep the stress levels down and to just focus on one task at a time.

Mantra: "I allow myself to embrace the calm of this moment while acknowledging the challenge as it passes by." ~ Namaste

Week Three

2011-04-10T00:20:00.000-07:00

Sometimes life just sets you back a pace or two in order to prepare you for what is ahead. This is how I feel about week three...

I had a very busy but incredible week this week and it sort of got in the way of my good intentions for running. I still got some great exercise in this week and still kept up with my yoga, but not to the extent that I had hoped for.

Part of what held me back this week is that I got my flu shot, which the first day made me pretty tired. After that I worked a 12 hour night shift with the St. John ambulance and that definitely drained me of my energy for the following day. Last night I did a 13 hour shift as well so yeah, I pretty much just needed a recovery day today. I have been overly gracious to myself this week and let myself have a break, and while that probably isn't great, I know that it is necessary in order to keep my immune system strong in preparation for my clinical placements.

So, that was my third week of my "Challenge"....

On the bright side, I found the most fabulous curry recipe - EVER - and made a beautiful vegetarian curry tonight for dinner. I have to share the link for the recipe here because it is seriously the best curry I have ever made or tasted! The last time I made a pumpkin curry I was quite disappointed in it and it was too thick and just not that special....This one was absolutely a beautiful combination of a whole bunch of ingredients and it truly was lovely! I will be enjoying this all week....

Thai Pumpkin Curry

My mantra this week: "Don't be discouraged by all that was undone, but be encouraged by all that you will still accomplish in the coming days." ~ Namaste

Week Two - Reflections

2011-04-02T21:00:00.000-07:00

Week two of my challenge for extra running and monitored eating, was not such a great one to be honest. I was pretty overwhelmed with the amount of work I needed to do for my assignments as well as additional hours I was putting in at the bakery. So, overall this week was a bit of a dud, really.

Having said that, I did a lot of reflecting and really came again to the place of acceptance and grace in this moment and realized that every week doesn't have to be perfect and doesn't have to live up to the expectations that we have for it. We are who we are in each moment, regardless of whether we accomplished that which we desired to do.

So, this week was about finding ways to maintain balance and wellness when I was struggling. I am happy that I have come to a place where I can recognize within myself when I am struggling and stressed and when I just need to take a step back and allow myself to recover. So, on the days when I was struggling for energy and to cope, I did some extra yoga and chose that over the more strenuous running.

My goal for running four times this week was brutally un-achieved when I only ran twice this week. However, both runs were moderately long and I am still happy to have done that. I also did a nice long tramp today so that counts as well, I think.

I was faithful to my continued yoga practice actually doing two-a-day yoga this week. I did not get in my two hour long sessions, but I am still happy with keeping up my yoga streak - Day 83 today!

Abs was good this week. I did about four days which was progress towards my five...

Diet this week was fairly good with a magnificent amount of vegetables consumed. I do confess that I ate a muffin one night and today I had a little baked apples with brown sugar/oats on top...Not much brown sugar though. The one thing that I am definitely proud of is the amount of times I declined chocolate and sweets! Several times this week I had every chance to splurge, but I turned it down and drank my green smoothie instead, so I am proud of that.

The point of doing this challenge is simply to ground myself and work harder towards building that strong foundation of lifestyle choices which will benefit my health, both now and in the future. It's not about proving something to myself or denying myself anything. I am happy with where I am at in my life, and I just want to learn how to better experience where I'm at.

Mantra: "Reach out to the new experiences of each day, and embrace where you are at in this present moment." ~ Namaste

Maintaining Commitment

2011-03-26T22:40:00.000-07:00

Well, this was the first week of increasing intensity in my running and applying more commitment to my healthy eating....

So far, so good. I ran 4 days this week (5 if you count the 1K warmup I did on my cardio day), and did 2 long yoga practices this week as well as my daily routine. I managed to do 4 days of abs this week, but didn't quite hit my goal of 5...still an improvement.

No chocolate or sugar this week...

I did have a coffee on Monday but I allowed myself that slip up because I was in an all day training class and I was DYING! haha....

Overall I am really happy with the progress I have made and I feel great. Continuing to look forward and make adjustments as I will be on study leave for the next three weeks. I am definitely excited about this extra time to do some of the things that usually get dumped in place of school/work.

Mantra: "Don't underestimate the power of commitment" ~ Namaste

Commitments

2011-03-20T01:15:00.000-07:00

At the start of my semester my goal was simply around finding peace and calm in the midst of the chaos of my schedule - to commit to daily yoga practice and take time out to just relax. Today was day 69 of that yoga streak and it continues to bless me and allow me to de-stress in the midst of my crazy student life!

Because I did not want to over extend myself, I set no expectations for my exercise/running, no real dedication to any specific goals or anything like that.

Now that the stressful part is over I am coming into a season where there is more availability for my running and more opportunity for commitment here. Without overstepping and pushing myself too hard, I want to work towards a healthy goal of committing to a 40 day challenge.

This challenge allows me to utilize the time I have on study break as well as the first two weeks of my placements to focus on changes that will positively impact my health:

40 Day Plan:

During the week - No coffee, No sugar, No alcohol, No snacks other than vegetables
Run - minimum of four days a week with mixture of 5, 7, 11k's
Yoga - continue daily yoga practice with minimum of two one hour sessions per week
Abs - some form of core workout five days per week
Weekends - tramping, long walks, freedom to have coffee

Tomorrow starts Day 1 and I will post once a week to update my progress with this commitment. My only real expectations for the outcome after 40 days is that I would like to feel stronger and if I lost a few lbs in the process I would be quite happy with that.

It is still all about finding acceptance and grace in the moments that challenge me, so keeping this at my center is really important to me.

Mantra: "I allow myself to embrace new commitments while still accepting the person that I already am." ~ Namaste

Peace in Chaos

2011-03-16T12:45:00.000-07:00

It is amazing to me how quickly life seems to go by and how sometimes you can feel like it is just moving right past you. School has been amazing this semester, but really hard-out and I have been completely bombarded and overwhelmed with research, assignments, readings etc. That is merely my own personal daily life; not to mention, the chaos and destruction globally in the past several weeks.

Like the waves crashing; this can be seen as fearful/scary, or as a beautiful and restorative sound...It is not always about the circumstance we are facing, but about how we respond to and deal with that circumstance.

Universally I think it is time to just take a step back and have a mental "time out"....To take a moment to allow our minds to quiet....To be grateful for all that we have, and honor all that we have lost...To embrace the present moment and allow our breath to give us that life force that will provide us the energy and strength we need to move forward...To let go of all that no longer serves us and to acknowledge the space that is created in that release...To fill the empty space with a sense of calm and peace...

In the midst of all the demands of my course I have been managing to take daily "time out" to practice my yoga and just have a moment to focus on the present and get grounded in that. I have also been able to recognize when I needed a break and time to just rest. This is a huge shift from my usual perfectionistic nature where I am always doing and going and trying to be something bigger/better....This shift in my mentality has been tremendous for me in this semester and I can truly feel the difference in my daily life.

It is not always easy to slow down and find peace in chaos - which is the challenge, really. In yoga we practice the idea of recognizing challenge and breathing through that moment with acceptance but not "responding" to it....This is the idea that I am speaking of here, to be able to see that there is challenge and chaos and demands around you, but to be able to quiet your mind and just breathe through it. This is how I apply my yoga practice to my daily life.

Are you facing challenges and demands in your daily life? How are you responding to that? Are you letting the stress of this chaos control you, or are you making a conscious effort to acknowledge the challenge without responding to it?

Mantra: "Let the quiet of your mind bring peace in this present moment, and let your breath bring the energizing life force into every corner of your body" ~ Namaste

The Grace to Change

2011-02-24T11:11:00.000-08:00

Just as the sun sets and rises again, so to our lives can have opportunity to set on the things of the past and rise to a new future...Discovering new things about yourself is a journey, really. I suppose none of us are ever fully matured, or "grown", we are constantly moving forward in our lives learning from our past and seeking a better future.

This week has been amazing for me. I just feel that I have grown so much in the ways that I have experienced things, the way I have dealt with situations, and the way that I feel about myself personally. It has been a very reflective week for me, and I think the reason that I share this is because I want to encourage you to also take time to reflect on where you are right now and where you have been in the past - Are you growing yourself? Are you challenging your thoughts? Are you changing behaviors within yourself so that you can experience life more fully?

To stay right where we are at in our lives can cause us to become quite stagnant, so it is actually good to constantly be changing and growing.

Mantra: "I allow myself the grace to grow and change without judgment towards the person that I once was." ~ Namaste

Mindfulness Meditation

2011-02-09T11:42:00.001-08:00

Mindfulness Meditation is a form of meditation which focuses on the experiences of the present moment. This type of insight meditation brings the mind to a state of awareness about the experiences and emotions felt. By accepting the experiences of the present moment without judgment there is a sense of peace and calmness.

Yesterday I came across this amazing journal article about recent findings on the influence of Mindfulness Meditation causing an increase in the gray matter of certain regions of the brain - mostly in the hippocampus - The increase in density in these areas may lead to an improvement with memory, stress responses, and an increase in serotonin (affecting mood/depression) among other things. The article is foundational for future research in this area, so I thought I would share that article with you:

Holzel, B., Carmody, J., Vangel, M., Congleton, C., Yerramsetti, S., Gard, T., & Lazer, S. (2011). Mindfulness practice leads to increases in regional brain gray matter density. Psychiatry Research: Neuroimaging, 191, 36-43.

Mantra: "Live each day in complete awareness of the present moment." ~ Namaste

Embracing Fear

2011-02-08T12:57:00.001-08:00

What is fear if we do not acknowledge it? How can we overcome that which we do not understand?

On my run this morning my thoughts were focused on this coming semester and what I expect to gain from the classes that I will be taking. I have long been nervous about this particular semester because the majority of the focus is on the Mental Health aspect of our nursing program. We are fully trained in this capacity so that we will be qualified to work in this component of nursing should the need/opportunity arise (If not properly certified you cannot work in this type of nursing in NZ).

So, my fears revolve around my own insecurities and the struggles that I have faced in my own life. As I was thinking about this so much this morning I realized that what I fear the most is that I will not be able to let go of the pain that I witness/experience during my placement and that I will bring it home and carry their burdens with me. I have always been one to care for people so deeply that I can literally feel their pain as if it were my own....While this may be good in some ways, it can be physically and emotionally exhausting as well. (And obviously if you did that for every patient you would yourself become a patient.) So, this is my biggest fear...

What I hope to gain from this semester and the expectations that I have is that I want to learn how to overcome this fear and learn how to properly handle working in this type of environment. I want to have the confidence to help people without bringing harm to myself.

So, my intention is just that - By acknowledging my fear, I want to find the right way to truly overcome it so that I can be a stronger and more courageous woman.

Is there something in your life that you fear? Is it keeping you from reaching your fullest potential or from helping someone else reach theirs?

Mantra: "I allow myself to feel fear and I embrace that fear in order to overcome it." ~ Namaste

Finding Your Authentic Self

2011-02-05T18:15:00.000-08:00

The past 26 days I have been on a yoga streak (I used to do yoga almost every day, but lately I have made it a habit to do it EVERY day without compromise...). In the process of doing my daily yoga practice I have found that I am more and more in tune with what I want from myself for the day, and what I want from life in general.

Coming to a place where I can just be who I am without worrying about what others think of me or if I will meet their expectations is huge. I have always been the type that needs to make people happy and needs to know that I am accepted and loved by those close to me. I have struggled in my life with the necessity to live according to others expectations and desires for me; rather than my own.

When we were at Franz Joseff Glacier this was such a peaceful moment.

Over the past 10 years I have gradually left those feelings behind me and come into myself. Daily I come to a new level in my life where I am more and more ready to be exactly who I am. (Whether those around me like or accept that or not...) The past month or so my intentions to myself have been inclusive of a lot of ideas which surround the concept of authenticity. For me this just re-iterates my need to embrace the life that I have and the person that I am.

Lately I have been studying a lot about things that lead to disease and cancer - Thanks to my summer science paper, Impaired Body Function - and the thing that has gripped me the most is the impact that chronic stress can have on the development of disease and cancer...With that said; there has been incredible research to support the idea that healthy living and proper diet and exercise can drastically reduce the risk for cancer/disease. This increases my motivation even more to pursue a life that is full of peace and contentment and to ensure that daily I allow myself the time to just let go of that which no longer serves me...To just release the negative and embrace my true self.

Taking pressure off of ourselves creates a freedom within that allows us to explore new potential in our own lives. When we can stop worrying about what those around us think, and about living up to the dreams that other people have for us; we can find a true sense of peace, contentment, and happiness.

Mantra: "Compare yourself to no one, for your life is unique to you alone." ~ Namaste

Using the energy of peace in your life

2011-01-30T10:53:00.000-08:00

Peace ~ What brings your mind to a place where the world stands still and all is well, and you have that moment where everything feels right?

For me, my sense of stillness and peace is brought in the wind. There are just moments when I am exposed to a breeze when I just stop and realize that everything in that present moment is just perfect and exactly as it should be.

Yesterday we did a really nice tramp up Sledge Track to the Platinum Mines and along the way it was quite breezy (totally fine since most of the track was uphill and we were hot and sweaty.) As the breeze would catch the trees they would bend and sway with an eerie creaking noise, and the ferns would rustle in their own time. It was something that I cannot truly explain very well, but it was incredibly peaceful and rejuvenating to be in this rainforest surrounded by all the energy from the greenery and then feeling the refreshing breeze all around.

When we got to the top it was very windy. Looking out over all the open landscape it just gave you such a rush and a sense of how small you are in the world. It was a very peaceful moment.

I will carry that sense of peace with me throughout the week and let the memory of that breeze just energize me when I start to feel low...Just embracing the remembrance of that sense of peace in that moment.

What brings your mind into a state of peace? Use that memory to bring you back when you feel stressed or overwhelmed this week.

Mantra: "I allow myself to embrace a sense of peace in this present moment, and to let that peace wash over me and energize me for the tasks ahead."

The Brave New Year

2011-01-08T01:07:00.001-08:00

Mantra: "Today I will be brave enough to love who I am right now in this present moment."

Like the iconic symbol in NZ of the fern, life is new and refreshing and always evolving - So fragile and yet so intricately detailed...There is a time and a season for everything under the sun. 2011 is my year for just being here - right now - in this present moment.

This year is going to be different for me because I am not planning to set any goals or resolutions - my only goal is simply to BE...To be in this present moment, to accept myself right here and now, and to live in the joy of that acceptance.

As easy as it may sound, this is actually a huge challenge because I am used to constantly pressuring myself to be more, do more, accomplish something bigger and better...I have always struggled with that need for perfection, and this new mantra and vision is one way I am making steps towards overcoming my own perfectionism.

With all the demands this year I just want to allow myself to live in this present moment without expectation of what I "should" be doing. Every time the thought, "I should..." comes to my mind I just want to focus on this mantra and remember that it's okay if I "don't".

Happy New Year ~ Namaste

*This thought was inspired by the Tiny Wisdom: On Being Fully What You Are

Staying True

2010-12-10T12:09:00.000-08:00

Every day life teaches us new lessons about who we are...For me, personally, this week I have been learning the lesson about staying true to myself and letting go of that which no longer serves me. Yoga teaches this principle and with each practice I am constantly reminded to ground myself in the moment to just embrace where I am at without judgment. Applying this same principle to life is a bit more challenging, however, when it means confronting the possibility of backing down from something or letting someone down.

Most of us would like to finish that which we set out to do. Most of us would like to be thought of as good people, good employees, good friends. Most of us find comfort in the acceptance and appreciation of others. This is where it gets complicated...There are times when, by seeking these things, we lose sight of who we truly are and what we feel inside. Our focus shifts from acceptance of ourselves in the moment to trying to transform who we are to please those around us.

My life lesson this week has been that sometimes we have to step out of our comfort zone and make changes in our life in order to maintain our own authenticity - in order to stay true to ourselves...I made this step last night when I resigned one of my jobs. I was finding that it was draining on me personally and was negatively impacting on my life and my happiness. I came to the realization that while I did not wish to quit something or let someone down, this job was no longer serving my life and bringing fulfillment to me.
Is there something in your life that you need to let go of? Maybe it's a relationship, a past hurt, a fear...Allow yourself to let go of that which no longer serves you.

"By staying true to myself, I can find joy and fulfillment in this present moment." ~ Namaste

My Story

2010-11-25T00:13:00.001-08:00

I have been inspired by my friend, Amber and her awesome bew blog, that life is so unique to each and every one of us and we all have a story to tell. Everyone's story is different and yet it makes them who they are...So, Here is "my story" in a nutshell.

As a teen I used to imagine my life to be anything other than what it was. I wanted to do something amazing and be something more...I wanted to go to Africa and make a difference in the world and do something huge that would change people's hearts and minds forever. I was so willing to do whatever it took and whatever God wanted me to give up - I was ready...But what I thought was the direction my life would take changed so drastically the night that I decided to give up my dreams of being a wife/mother and go to Africa.

Literally the very next morning I met my husband...

You know how they say that God's plans for your life don't always match up with what you dreamed for yourself? Yeah...It was exactly like that. Within four days of meeting Travis I decided to cancel my plane ticket to the college where I was planning to study Cross-Cultural Missions. I felt that God had asked, "are you willing" and I had answered, "yes" but then he said, "that's good, but I have a different task in mind...I was just checking!" Sometimes I say that God gets a good laugh out of my life and that is so true - He always keeps me guessing.

A year later Travis and I got married and I embarked on the challenging years of life as a military wife...

Through years of deployments, wars, stress, loss, jobs, moves (oh so many moves!!), and traveling to foreign lands, life continued to take it's turns. I was still uncertain about what the final destination would be. While together we sought to follow His direction for our life as a couple, I was also finding myself...I have discovered that finding myself has been all a part of this big plan and gradually I have developed a whole new relationship with God that is totally different than anything I thought it would ever be.

When Travis got out of the army and we moved to Alaska we were at yet another crossroads of deciding what to do with our lives and it was during this time in our life that we had planned to start a family and settle down...Once again, not in God's plan. Looking back now I can see how the things that He had in store for our lives never would have played out had OUR plan worked...And so, because we were happy to just follow what we felt God was leading us to do, we emigrated to a beautiful new country and established ourselves here where I have been able to study and pursue the career that I know God has prepared me for all along the way.

Every step along the way He was watching over us, walking beside us, or carrying us through.

Obviously the adventure of my life has really just begun, but truthfully the experiences and challenges that I have faced in my life have made me who I am today and I wouldn't trade that for anything in the world. No one can ever take your own experiences away from you, no one can ever change who you are deep inside - that is ALL you and belongs solely to you. The feelings and dreams that you have for yourself are unique only to yourself and that is something truly to be treasured.

So, what is your story? What are the dreams that you dream for yourself? Do you find that in hindsight sometimes it might be a good thing that things didn't go as planned?

Mantra: "Allow yourself to embrace the life that you are living in this present moment and find gratitude in the life that you have lived." ~ Namaste

One With The Earth

2010-10-31T22:52:00.000-07:00

All creation is unified together with the breath; together with the understanding that we are all connected. We find strength and are grounded by rooting ourselves to the earth and drawing our strength from it.
I have been drawing my strength from that unity and finding peace through my meditation on this. Throughout the stresses of exam week and my upcoming surgery (Or rather, my second attempt at it...hopefully we will get to go through with it this time!) I have found a sense of relaxation as I have been embracing my yoga practice and I have faithfully been taking time to really develop my practice.

I had never really realized how many awesome videos are out on youtube, so I have been enjoying using those to challenge my practice and take things to a new level.

I am still staying faithful to my commitment of 40-50min. in the AM and 20min in the PM with a 10 min. meditation. So far that works really well and I have been able to maintain that practice. When I start back to running again I will cut back a little, but right now that is a good challenge for me.

Yesterday Travis and I did an amazing 18K walk and just had an awesome time enjoying the beautiful creation. (This picture is one of my favorites from the walk.)

"Allow yourself to draw strength from the earth and all that it offers to you." ~ Namaste

Heart Expanding Practice

2010-10-25T11:51:00.000-07:00

I found this awesome yoga video so I thought I would share it. It is so relaxing and really good ~ Namaste

Renewed Commitment

2010-10-23T12:07:00.000-07:00

Last week was an incredibly emotional and stressful week for me. I had a huge practical assessment for my nursing program which was a pass or fail (thankfully I passed) and then I was also anticipating a long awaited surgery. I was quite apprehensive and just really nervous not only for the whole process, but for the results that would later come. Unfortunately after five hours of sitting and anxiously waiting to go in for surgery, my procedure was canceled. (They had run out of OR time due to some unexpected complications with other patients.) I was actually all gowned up and everything! So, then came the incredibly emotional feelings that follow when you have been waiting so anxiously for something and then it not actually taking place...Hard to describe, but I can just say that I was just physically and emotionally drained. Hopefully it will be rescheduled within a few weeks.

I share this because I was challenged deeply in this situation to really take a step back and appreciate where I was in the present moment. In the midst of the confusion and frustration to just find a sense of peace knowing that there was a reason that this had happened.

The hard part for me is that I haven't felt well enough to run much over the past several weeks and I was prepared knowing that it would be another month after surgery before I would be back at it again. Now, with this added setback it will be even longer. That is really discouraging to me because I know how hard it is to get back into it after such a long break.

Because of this set back I am renewing my commitment to a healthy lifestyle and increasing my intensity in other areas of my life. I am committing to a new yoga and meditation routine. I have been faithful to my yoga practice, but it has slacked off a lot and become more of a comfort thing than an actual challenge. I want to increase the intensity and bring back the challenge. My goal is a minimum 40 min morning routine and 20 min evening with daily meditation starting at 10 min. I am going to use the aid of some online videos to keep me focused on new poses and challenges.

I am also going to recommit to my "no processed foods" ideal (Which I pretty much already to, but over exam week I tend to eat too much chocolate!) I must really watch my diet while I am not running, and summer time with all the fruits/vege is a perfect time to really focus on those lighter foods!!

Recognizing the good in challenging moments is not always easy, so this is my focus this week as I head into exam week.

"Let the present moment be filled with peace, and allow yourself to find contentment in this moment." ~ Namaste

Peace and Promises

2010-10-19T12:53:00.000-07:00

You know how some days you just need to have that feeling of peace to rush over you and just be reminded that God is always with you and His presence is surrounding you? Well, that is my favorite part about New Zealand. I know I seem to be obsessed with rainbows lately, but it seriously just gives me this rush in the present moment that "all is right with the world" and that everything will be okay.

It's been a stressful week with preparing for a HUGE practical exam for our nursing program (which, thankfully I passed yesterday! YEAH!) and then my upcoming surgery tomorrow morning...Anyway, I just really needed a moment of peace on Monday afternoon, and I was sitting at the table talking to Travis and caught a glimpse of this out of the corner of my eye - it was so bright that I could see it through the curtains!!!
Rainbows are really hard to catch on camera because they never look as brilliant as they are in real life, but this was actually a double rainbow and the main one (pictured here) was one of the most brilliant ones that I have seen.....I admit that I did feel like the rainbow was just for me since it was right over our backyard! Even in the midst of day to day struggles we need to find a moment to step back and embrace the peace that is offered to us each day.

My plan is to carry this thought with me tomorrow and to just rely on the promises that He is always with us and will give us the strength we need no matter what the circumstance. Life is so beautiful, and we just need to take the time to recognize that.

"I allow myself to find the calm in this present moment." ~ Namaste

Strength

2010-10-01T00:57:00.000-07:00

I went for my first run in three weeks today. It felt really good to be back out there. I am still having some health issues, but finally got on the short wait-list for minor surgery in the next three months. The good side to it all is that I will hopefully feel a hundred times better after the surgery. The downside is that it may be at least four weeks recovery time before I can run after the procedure. I am trying not to think of that setback and just trying to focus on this present moment. I don't know when the surgery will be so I am just going to focus on getting back out there and running as much as I can until that time.
This picture was taken two weeks ago at our one year anniversary of being in New Zealand. Since this picture Travis has shaved off his beard! =)

We moved into our new house this week so that has been awesome. I have some pretty fabulous areas for yoga now so I'm totally stoked about that. I have one whole wall that is perfect for my hand/head stands....AWESOME!

School is getting pretty stressful these days. I feel like this semester has just been emotionally draining for me - between working so much, wondering about Travis' job, and health stuff - I am ready for a holiday for sure! I cannot wait for this semester to finish and just know that it is behind me...Only two more weeks of lectures and then two weeks of study break before exams!

"Focus on the positive in this present moment." ~ Namaste

Life calls for adjustments

2010-09-24T12:18:00.000-07:00

Several things have gotten in my way of starting my six week plan...I have had some health issues lately and my knee was still really bothering me on my last run a week ago. So, I have take a few weeks off. I am still doing yoga, but taking time off from exercise. I will start my plan up again soon. Next week will be my gradual transition week and then the following week I will start back into things full on. Sometimes life just calls for a respite...

"I allow myself to respond to the needs of my body and just relax and let it heal." ~ Namaste

Organized Goals for Healthy Living

2010-09-02T12:34:00.000-07:00

Monday will begin the second half of my second semester of first year nursing. I decided that this is a great little six week time-frame to establish some goals and challenge myself.

Going into the next six-week period I have already knocked out most of my assignments over the study break, so I can really spend time focusing on studying and preparing for mid-terms and final exams. My goal this semester was to really be organized and to limit the time that I write (and re-write) all of my assignments. So far it's been an amazing semester and I have definitely stuck to my plan.

On Monday we will be starting our placements at a local nursing home. It will be quite awesome, and at the same time a bit exhausting. Being on placement means that on top of the average study time and work schedule I will be pulling 8 hour days working as a student nurse - This doesn't allow for a lot of time for personal exercise or household duties.....So, it's really all about planning.

I measured myself again this morning and ironically I have the exact same measurements and weight that I have consistently maintained since February. This is really my healthy place so I'm content to stay with that. I would still like to see my arms a bit more toned so that is my focus.
Six Week Goals for Exercise:

Really focus on getting two days a week of core training in with a focus on upper body.
Cross Training once a week - preferably swimming
Three main runs a week - Distance, Speed, Moderate with any additional runs that I have time for.

Six Week Goals for Nutrition:

Increase intake of B-12 by increasing intake of eggs and fortified soy milk.
Continue no chocolate
No muffins for this six week period.
Decrease amount of breakfast porridge.

Mantra for this week:

"Make the most of every moment and embrace whatever life brings you today." ~ Namaste

Reflections

2010-08-28T19:24:00.000-07:00

I have found this semester to be incredibly focused on self reflections and personal opinions about one's own health...With the first major project being a reflection of self health as compared to the Maori health model (as discussed in my last blog post), and now with the completion of my science project I had to do an entire analysis of my daily food intake as compared to the standard accepted ideal for what you SHOULD be taking in! haha.

I was pleasantly surprised to note that I actually consume a huge amount of healthy food and only occasionally do I slip in those naughty little extras! The majority of my diet is made up of fruits/vegetables with the daily grains, nuts, beans to balance everything out. I am, however, short on intake of vitamin B-12 (due to the fact that I do not eat meat and also a limited dairy intake) and will be trying my best to incorporate an increase in eggs and fortified soy products into my diet.

My running this month has really taken a dive. While I am still running quite a bit, it's not as easy or enjoyable as it was a few weeks ago and I cannot seem to get my motivation to really get out there and go hard...I am experimenting with possible solutions at the moment.

At the moment I am kind of just in a "holding" position with weight/health/running and not really doing much adjusting at the moment. I'm okay with that, as I have a lot of other things going on right now that need my attention.

"I allow myself to enjoy this present moment and to embrace right where I am at in my life, without expectation or anticipation for the future." - Namaste

My House of Health

2010-08-04T18:45:00.000-07:00

As I continue to reflect on my health and wellness I am completely moved by how much my life has changed and even just in the past three years how much my health has improved. I think when we moved to Valdez about three years ago was probably when I was at my lowest point of health. Mostly due to the fact that my life had lost balance.

Wellness really is about balance and insuring that every part of your life is in order. Without that balance things start to fall out of place and everything comes crashing down. This is reflected in the Maori health model, Te Whare Tapa Wha, (House of Health) in which a person's life is represented as a four walled house. One wall symbolises the physical; one the mental/emotional; one the social/family and friends; and one the spiritual. All of these walls are built with the foundation being the land from which you were born and where your spirit is connected. Learning about this health model has been one of the highlights of my first year of nursing school. Mostly because I feel such a strong connection to it and can directly relate to this concept. I understand how easy it is for life to fall out of balance and for the strength that the walls once had to be weakened.

Because of this reflection I have decided to make some personal changes in my life...I have shared many times about my perfectionistic nature and my tendency towards workaholism. While last semester I was proud of some of the ways in which I worked around these tendencies, I still overworked myself and did way too much. I had commited this semester not to study so much and not to spend so much time "perfecting" my assignments over and over again. While I did a really good job of the later this first part of semester (I only spent a reasonable amount of time on my assignments and I did not re-write any of them!!) I have fallen back into the trap of over-studying. While most people probably struggle more with procrastination and lack of desire to study, I am the total opposite and it becomes an obsession where I feel I MUST read every chapter required and do every study book question and borrow every recommended book from the library!!! Yeah, not healthy....

So, my new commitment as of week 4 of second semester....STOP!!! Take a break and enjoy life.....I am commiting to a minimum of one hour down time EVERY day and to take one day a week where I am NOT allowed to study at all!! I will go for walks and relax, catch up on blogging and just enjoy myself for a few hours and allow myself time to regroup.

Today was my relaxation day and I went for a long walk with Travis, called my Granny, caught up on emails and journal writing and I am about to do a nice yoga session.

Life really is all about finding balance, so this is my commitment to myself in order to achieve a higher level of health. As a side note, I did go for a health assessment at the gym on Wednesday and I am in the best shape of my life! (Still hovering around 135, but my body fat is way down so that is really what matters. Muscle weights more than fat, so that is probably why even after all of my half marathon training I still haven't lost weight....) I will be making some minor changes to my diet (increasing protein after my runs) but otherwise I'm really happy with that result.

"Life is full of adjustments and challenges, may we find peace in those moments and recognize that it is all part of a fullfilled life." ~Namaste

Pursuit of Wellness

2010-07-19T01:00:00.001-07:00

So, what is wellness? Why should we seek to be happier, healthier people? What changes can we truly make in our lives that will allow us to view ourselves as "well"?...

These are just some of the thoughts that have been passing through my mind this week as I tramped, as I swam, as I ran, as I cooked...basically just constantly throughout each day this week.

Me on top of the Dead Man's Track on our Thursday tramp.

You might ask why this has been on my mind so much lately...Well, lucky me, I have started my second semester of nursing school and it ROCKS!!!...This semester I am loving already as it focuses a lot on health/wellness/nutrition etc. Our first essay is centered around our view of our own health and how it relates to the Maori health model. (More to come on this.) I find this topic fascinating and seriously "right down my ally". You know I love to talk about eating healthy and exercising and all the things that are incorporated with holistic well-being.

Throughout the past three years I have explored so many aspects of alternative medicine from Chinese medicine traditions, to yoga, acupuncture, acupressure, massage therapy, aromatherapy, feng shui, mindful meditation, vegetarianism etc. I am open for anything and I am willing to try it all! It has also really broadened my acceptance of cultural differences when it comes to holistic wellness.

I have been reading a great book this week about promoting wellness in nursing and it has some fabulous ideas in it. Essentially wellness is different things to different people, but holds much of the same truths for all - A striving towards being better - Even the healthiest person can embark on a journey towards wellness if they desire to improve their well-being. Wellness is multifaceted and includes every part of a person; spiritual, emotional, physical. It is impacted by not only the environment and society, but also culture.

For me personally this journey is only just beginning. I strive every week to make some change to my daily living that will impact my life in a positive way.

What changes are you making in your life that support your journey towards wellness? What happened in your life that brought about the desire to improve your well-being?

"May I be happy, may I be healthy, may I be whole." ~ Namaste

And the vacation continues...

2010-07-01T20:10:00.000-07:00

Vacation week has allowed me some fabulous opportunities to really get in some great runs, swims, tramps etc....Just an overall combination of exercises and opportunities to get out of the house and enjoy some fresh air, sunshine, rain, fog, cold - well, it's been pretty much a combo of everything this week here in PN!!

I am feeling so much more confident in my half marathon training. This morning I aced my furthest distance to date - 10.12 miles - and that really made me feel like the half is within my grasp! I still have over a month of training left, so I am feeling good about that.
Swimming this week has been amazing. I am really loving being back in the pool and I just think it's such fabulous cross-training. Allowing your body to rest and your legs to have a break from the constant pounding is key to building both strength as well as endurance.

I confess that my yoga practice has not been as strong of late. While I am still practicing every day, it has dwindled down to a short session of late and that was not my intention. I'm not sure what the reason for this is, but I don't seem to be as motivated as I usually am. My focus this week is to start really getting in some good "Mat Time" this week in the mornings before my day gets started. (I have got to get into a good habit before uni starts up again on the 12th!)

Taryn, Travis and I went to Woodville this week to have Yummy Mummy's cheesecake! (Can you believe that we drove 30 min. out of town for cheesecake? It was worth it, and what are vacations for?)

In other confessions this week I have not been very faithful to my healthy eating lifestyle that I like to keep up....I have had both cheesecake, carrot cake, AND a half of a brownie this week! OMG...yes, yes, I know....While I have done a whole heap of exercise this week, already hit 54k's, I should not let that be my excuse for negelting my diet. Ironically it does leave me feeling bad, so I do not know why I do it....I suppose my "re-commitment" to myself just simply needs to happen every day! haha....

As I re-commit myself to my habits of healthy living, I also re-commit my mind to practicing loving kindness meditation and to focus on the needs of others around me this week.

My Mantra:

"Find the will to commit and to withstand temptation in this pressent moment." ~ Namaste

Process of Elimination

2010-06-24T16:08:00.000-07:00

I have mentioned before that I am daily on a quest to become healthier, to feel better, to improve my performance and energy levels etc. Really, that's why I do a lot of what I do - why I run, why I meditate and practice yoga, why I don't eat Burger King etc.

Last year I decided to embark on a vegetarian journey and give up meat after realizing that I felt so much better on the days when I didn't eat meat. It's been about a year now since I switched over, and I truly have seen a tremendous difference in the way I feel. While I am not "strictly" a vegetarian (If circumstances dictate, I will on occasion stray...but it's only a few times a year, and mostly out of politeness for my host, or because I just can't be bothered to care in that moment!)

I have also discovered about myself that I do not tolerate dairy very well (Which I found to be true of myself about two years ago.) I would not call myself lactose intolerant, but I am definitely lactose sensitive. I can still eat cheese moderately, but milk is just out of the question.

Over the past year I noticed that certain foods just really make me feel bad - pears, honey, sometimes apples, chocolate, excess of sugar etc...So, over the past year I have gradually been eliminating things that I find do not benefit me or sometimes just make me feel downright awful.

I thought this was really just my own quirkiness until I was told by an endometriosis specialist that they had discovered there were certain foods which could potentially trigger more pain in patients if they ate these certain foods. Turns out that most of the foods that I had been eliminating from my own diet were all on that list - how ironic - They call these FODMAP foods and recommend to suffers from certain diseases such as endometriosis, Chron's, IBS etc. to try eliminating these foods from their diet.

I find it quite interesting to discover what works for me and to get to know my own body better by knowing what makes me feel more alive and energetic, what makes me lethargic, what makes my stomach ache and cramp, and what makes me feel fabulous and ready to just concur the world.

While I may be so in love with chocolate and coffee, and other delicious things; I definitely feel better when I don't eat/drink them. The hard part is not feeling deprived of the things I love...However, I have found that in moderation these things really don't effect me - for example, I could have a small bite of something sweet and feel fine, but if I eat a whole piece of cake I feel the effects...I could have a tiny coffee and feel fine, but if I have three cups of tea, a coffee, and another cup of tea the caffeine starts to really effect me. Now, I know the rule of "everything in moderation", but you can't tell me that you honestly think about that when you sit down to have a muffin or a piece of cake! (Is a whole piece of cake REALLY excessive? I don't think so...but then again, everything is relative to the individual. What might be okay for you, may cause me misery...One really does have to find what works for their individual needs.)

So, I am continuing my quest for health and happiness...I am daily adjusting my diet and working towards eliminating that which makes me feel bad, and only including what my body can tolerate in order to feel the best that I can feel. I think it is highly important that people treat their bodies kindly and listen to those subtle hints that your body is trying to tell you to back off on some things even if it IS your favorite!

My mantra this week:

"Tune in to the subtle hints your body is sending out in this present moment, and embrace that message in order to find your true health." ~ Namaste

Training Week 5

2010-06-21T03:02:00.000-07:00

Well, this week starts another attempt at getting into training shape for the half in August. So far my progress has been non-existent as mostly I have been trying to recover and survive through sickness and finals and everything else that life has thrown at me. However, I am now starting afresh and renewing my commitment. (When I say non-existent, I do not mean that I haven't worked out, I just mean that I'm not really moving forward...)

I have been doing a little swimming this past week and totally loving getting back into that. My goal this week is to increase my yoga practice as well and really get back into the flexibility and strengthening. With swimming now I should be able to increase my upper body strength without weights (as I simply do not have time to lift these days.)

Here is a picture from our tramp around the Castle Point area today.

We are doing quite a few tramps on the days when I am not working, so I reckon that is good cross training as well. We did a real long one the other day for about 3+ hours so that was good, and then today we went for a few hours as well. It's good work on the quads at any rate.I am hidden in this picture as well, but it's still cool....I need to start wearing brighter colors so I can be seen! haha...

I did much better with my food intake this week, but planning to take steps even further and keep being faithful to less and less added things and just keeping the majority of what I take in to fruits/vege...I am working a lot again this week and that makes it quite challenging, but I make an effort...Hopefully next week I can comment on progress made towards my training.

"Enjoy the beauty in every present moment, and take nothing for granted." ~ Namaste

The Beauty of Manawatu Gorge

2010-06-06T01:00:00.000-07:00

Taryn took this awesome picture of the Gorge, so I had to share it - Oh so beautiful!! I love New Zealand!!

Tramping in Winter

2010-06-04T23:02:00.001-07:00

The weather in Palmerston North has been AMAZING for "supposedly" winter-time! Because Travis is back and he has his heart set on tramping all the time, we have managed to get in some really nice tramps this week. Thursday after work we went on the Sledge Track trail and then yesterday we did a big afternoon tramp through the Manawatu Gorge with Taryn and Tim.

I have also gotten in a lot of good runs this week, so overall it's been great! Study week was a huge success as I feel really prepared and ready for the final exams for my papers. I have three finals next week and then one the following week.

Still doing my daily yoga, but my plan is to increase my practice and start incorporating more abdominal workouts throughout the week. This week completed week two of my half marathon training schedule, so next week starts the increase in mileage...And so the story begins...

I'm BAAACK.....

2010-05-30T20:52:00.000-07:00

Ah, yes...It feels so good to be back again - much less stressed, much more full of energy, much happier!

One of the things that helped with all of the above is the fact that Travis came home two weeks ago. It is so amazing having him back and feels so good to have someone around to do things with and to distract me from "crazy study" mode...

Speaking of "crazy study" mode...I have been working really hard towards viewing my finals with a "good is good enough" mentality. While I am still studying heaps for my big finals coming up next week, I am also trying to really stress the importance of finding balance and not over-cramming for stuff that I essentially already know. I'm trying really hard to find some grace in there towards myself.

Running has been amazing this month. Taryn and I ran the 13K two weeks ago and that set us up for a wonderful training program. We decided to go for it and do the half marathon in August so we took a week of recovery runs and then started our 12 week training course last Monday. It has been going really well and we have been really faithful to it so far. I am definitely feeling more dedicated to a consistant program and my goal is to keep it up even during break (which is where I sort of gave out last time and struggled to stay faithful).

I have also been doing yoga every day and I have given up chocolate faithfully (with a few minor - very minor - exceptions) Also, I have been faithful to giving up my evening toast, but have unfortunately subsitituted it with cheese and crackers (not sure which is the worst option?) I reckon as long as I'm staying healthy and feeling good it really isn't a huge deal.

Yes, I am staying healthy and feeling great. Still weighing in the same and still making daily adjustments and changes to follow a healthy lifestyle. So far 2010 has been an amazing year for me, and I am so excited and proud of the accomplishements and progress that I have made. My only real goal at this point is to stay faithful and keep it up...

"Allow yourself to find contentment in this present moment." ~ Namaste

Reflections

2010-05-08T01:44:00.000-07:00

First of all I must comment/reflect on the fact that college life is hard!.....While I was totally expecting classes and assignments to be hard, I don't know that I was quite prepared for the overall drain on your whole person - not really so much the physical strain of study, but somehow it effects just every part of you....I am seriously SOOO tired! Last week I was on placement all week and had two assignments due plus work so I think it all just has come crashing down on me. I am not sleeping well at night, and I am sure that adds to the feelings of draining energy....From what I have been told, tomorrow at the cafe will be insanely busy because of Mother's Day and I have been warned that by the end of the day I am likely to be "huddled in the corner crying" from the mass chaos of it all! (Isn't that motivating and wouldn't that make you want to go into work? haha....This made me laugh.)

Having complained for a moment above, I will now conclude with the fact that I am totally LOVING my nursing program. Despite the exhaustion and mental challenge - I know I have said it before - seriously, I love it! I was definitely intended for this and I cannot wait to actually start practicing.....Every time I think about how blessed I am that we made the choice for me to go to school and pursue this career, I am overwhelmed - I truly am so blessed! We got our science mid-term exams back this week and it turns out that I did really well. So far I am pulling out an A in the class which is miraculous considering that my fear was maybe not even passing. (It's one of the highest failed papers at uni.) I am stoked that it is going so well.....Just have to keep studying my butt off and hopefully I will come through well in the end!

Running has still been on again, off again. I got in some brilliant runs at the beginning of the week, but now that I'm coming on the close to another weekend I am just knackered and can barely even crawl into bed at night! haha....Again, I reckon if I get in at least three good runs a week that's a good effort on my part and I'm okay with that. I have to find some grace and understanding towards myself - no judgment.....

I have decided to go on another chocolate fast.....I have found that I just feel so much better without sweets in my system and I seem to run better somehow. I will keep you posted on how this goes.....So far I have gotten through one day! haha~

Still hovering around 135, so happy that at least SOMETHING is consistent in my life! =)

I haven't been doing as much daily yoga and I'm sad about this - I actually have been too tired, how pathetic is that? No excuses - I need to get over it already.....I am going to try and implement some things in my daily routine this week and see if that helps with energy levels at all. It really is all about experimentation. I am going to start taking vitamin D again and see if that helps. I had a lack of energy in the winter in Alaska and vitamin D really helped once I discovered this....it could be that I am experiencing some of the same with winter coming on here? Not sure......

I discovered two new things this week: Feijoas and Lamingtons!! YUM to both.....feijoas are a citrus fruit shaped like a kiwi fruit, but have a peel kind of like a lime. They are really tart and some people think they have kind of a "perfume" taste. They are FABULOUS in smoothies and have been the highlight of my "green smoothies" this week!! Lamingtons, on the other hand, are not as healthy - it's a delicate sponge cake with cream inside and it's kind of soaked in chocolate on the outside and covered in coconut. (Hard to describe, but SUPER awesome!!) Yeah....that was my chocolate treat on Friday after I got my science test back!!!

Well, my friends, it's 9pm and since I'm a Nana these days I'm off to do yoga and crawl into bed....

"I allow myself to find acceptance in how things are in this present moment without judgment towards all that is not." ~ Namaste

Life

2010-04-28T13:09:00.000-07:00

Well, sorry I haven't blogged on here in a while, things have been a bit crazy with school and everything. The rest of Easter break was so fabulous. I got a lot of work done on my assignments and managed to squeeze in quite a bit of actual work hours between Hannah's and Barista's. (Although this weekend is my last official weekend at Hannah's.)

School is going well, my first papers all came back relatively well and I am feeling really good about my second assignments (although, I must add that the amount of research involved in these assignments is unbelievable!! I seriously spend SO many hours researching journals and stuff - it would blow your mind. It's all very interesting, but really time consuming.) So, that's where I have been......

Last week I was on placements at the nursing home again. I got to do quite a bit of independent work, which was super cool. I am really loving the residents there so that's been fun. We started work on our care plans last week so that was interesting. (Essentially we have to interview a resident and create this whole medical record for them and a care plan about all the various things we will do to improve their quality of life etc.....It's really interesting. Again, really time consuming.) We still have one more week to work on it, so all is well.

This week we are all frantically studying for our big science mid-term that will be up on Friday.....I cannot believe that we only have four weeks of classes left! It's amazing. So, after our classes finish we have a study week and then a week of final exams and that wraps up first semester!!!!

Running has been off and on these days. I hurt my ankle/foot last week and took a week off, so this is my first week back. I'm taking it easy and not going too far, but it's going well. I find myself getting caught up in study and it's just so hard to pull myself away and go for a run. I'm working on it, but right now I'm a little obsessive about studying still......I did good over Easter to take breaks, but now I'm feeling the crunch of all I haven't studied and feeling the need to really crack down.

Surprisingly I have lost a little weight even with the decrease in mileage so I don't know what's up with that. I tend to be hovering around 134 now so that's kind of weird, but I'll take it......It certainly is no reflection of all the wine and chocolate I have consumed in the past week! ha.....

Well, that is essentially a quick overview of the past few weeks. I am working to get back on track with my eating (I haven't been eating as much as I should or well-balanced meals - yeah, popcorn doesn't really count! ha) I am working on that and starting to cook more for myself again. It's hard to cook when it's just you and you are so busy - so much easier to just have toast or something when you are studying.....NOT a habit I want to continue.....Back to the veggies and beans for me - here I come.....Last night I made a huge pot of chili and tonight I'm making a lentil quiche so that should give me some variety this week.

All the best to all of you, and I hope you are well!

"Make the most of every present moment!" ~ Namaste

Love covers all...

2010-04-06T01:04:00.000-07:00

Family may not always come in the form of flesh and blood...Sometimes those that love us the most are close friends who take us for who we are in this present moment and embrace every aspect of our life...I am so grateful for the many friends that I hold dear to my heart, who are as close to me as my own flesh and blood could ever be. I love you so much, and pray blessings on each of you this holiday season.

This was my first holiday alone in NZ and while I did not do much - other than work - it was a good one. I did have a really wonderful reflective run on Easter Sunday and that was the highlight of my week. It was the farthest that I have run to date - a FULL 8 miles - and it was just a special run since my entire focus was solely on the gift of God's love through His sacrifice as well as through His beautiful creation...just a great time of peace.

And yes, I'm blonde again!!

My yoga meditations have also been really peaceful and reflective this week as well. Coming to terms with some stressful moments and just letting them float by...My mindfulness practice is definitely paying off.

I was really struggling at work with my "perfectionist" tendencies since the big corporate office has these demands and expectations of us each week. It was hard for me to just work and relax and have fun when so much is being expected of us as employees and our value as an employee is rated based on whether or not we meet these expectations. I finally came to a realization that this is not healthy for my life. If I cannot seperate my feelings of worth from their expectations than it's just not good for me to be in that sort of business and it puts too much stress on my life...so, I quit. (It was only 6.5 hours a week anyway, and just not worth the stress.) I will work for the rest of the month there, but then take a step back and try to find a better balance. I will pick up extra hours at the cafe so it will all equal out in the end, but it will just be healthier for me. (This was a big step for me, so I'm proud that I did it, and I know that my life will be happier for it.)

My new Easter Break haircut!

My running was a little more spaced out this week, but I still got in several great runs....Still hoovering at 135 and I think that's a really healthy place for me. I have no real desire to drop any more weight, just to keep running and being content in that...

I had some family news today that really kind of threw me for a loop, so I didn't run today, I took a "mental health day" and just did some therapeutic things for myself - like got a coffee, got my hair cut/colored, made homemade pizza, talked to Travis on the phone for over an hour etc...=) Life is always so much better when you can talk to the ones you love and know that they are there loving you in return. I am so blessed to have such an amazing husband and some awesome friends out there too!

My mantra of healing this week:

"Today I embrace the healing love of Christ and just let it flow to every wounded part of me in this present moment." ~ Namaste

Loving Kindness Meditation

2010-03-25T01:15:00.000-07:00

I confess that this week I have had more chocolate than I have consumed in a LONG time...don't know what is up with that, but it's been a struggle this week, and I just gave in. It's my expression of love towards myself in every moment! ha.....

While I have eaten chocolate, I have not run as much this week.....What's up with that? Well, my shins started bothering me at the beginning of the week, and I opted to take a few days to rest and hopefully prevent any injury. I guess you could say that this would be considered my "break from real life" week since I have given in to both my need for physical rest as well as my need for chocolate.....Ah, it happens.

Overall things are going great. Since Travis isn't around I have definitely been indulging in a lot of steamed vegetables for dinner and smaller evening meals. (Tonight I had a bag of popcorn - again, a treat for myself! - Guess I have felt the need to "treat" myself a lot this week!) Note to self, that the week is ending and so must the indulgence. =) haha.

My approach to running is changing slightly as I am trying to really follow my body and just go where it tells me. I decided that if I am not running a race or something then I shouldn't stress over training. I want running to continue to be fun and therapeutic, so I am just going to follow a "guideline" and let things fall into place depending on how I feel. Taking the pressure off, actually allows for more flexibility and less judgment towards myself.

It's really all about letting go of the judgment and offering myself a dose of loving kindness throughout my week. I am learning that it is hard to offer to others what you cannot give yourself. If you are critical of yourself, you are more likely to be critical of others as well. If you offer yourself kindness, than hopefully the kindness will also flow through to those around you.

As part of my loving kindness meditation I have been using this mantra this week:

"May I be happy just as I am...May I be safe and protected from inner and outer harm...May I be healthy, free from physical suffering...May I live in this world with ease, free from inner and outer conflict." ~ Namaste

Less Perfectionism

2010-03-16T23:39:00.000-07:00

I think I mentioned that I am doing a "Less Perfectionism" workshop at Massey. We meet every Tuesday and we are discussing ways to overcome some of the negative effects of striving to be perfect. While obviously there are some great benefits to striving to do well and setting goals for yourself, some people (such as myself) struggle with balance in this and can take it to the extreme.

We are using a lot of mindfulness/meditation techniques which are fabulous and I have already begun to see positive outcome in my experience. For example, today I took my science quiz online even though I still have until Monday to complete it. My natural instinct would be to study incessantly until Sunday and then take the quiz at the last minute. Instead, knowing that I had already devoted a large amount of time to studying these topics, I decided to just give it a go this morning so I could put it out of my mind and move on to more important things...The result - I got 19 out of 20 questions right! My conclusion - I would have spent another four days of cramming study in with the end result being exactly the same. I could not have done better, and therefore it would have been a huge waste of time.......(the same strategy applied to my Human Development quiz which I also took four days early and got 8.5% - 33 out of 40.) Point proven that this workshop is definitely helping me!!

While I note the positive effect of the workshop, I also acknowledge my continued need for improvement. I obsessed over my essay for almost five hours today before finally deciding that it should be good enough to turn in! ha.....(Okay, so I definitely need work on this area.) It was just hard because I thought I was done with the paper and then the instructor seemed to change his mind a little on what he really wanted our paper to reflect so I sort of had to re-organize the whole thing and it threw me way off....

Anyway, these are just some reflections that I have had today on how this workshop is helping me strengthen my weaknesses. (And hopefully find balance and contentment as I study.) This week I am starting a practice on "Loving Kindness Meditation". I'll let you know how it goes.

My mantra for today is:

"I allow myself to celebrate the positive changes in my life and to embrace the joy of the present moment. " ~ Namaste

Pictures

2010-03-14T11:36:00.001-07:00

Practicing with my camera timer..so I thought I would post a few updated pictures...

Mindfulness

2010-03-11T22:07:00.001-08:00

It is so hard to believe that my third week of uni has come to a close. Time is definitely flying by! I am very happy to say that I am finding balance and a certain calmness as I have finally seemed to get a grip on managing my study.

This week I started a workshop on perfectionism which is fabulous. I definitely need the direction and encouragement to manage my tendency to strive for perfection. Because of my past and the way I was raised, it is something that I have really struggled with and it can often become quite an obsession. In order to find balance in my study I joined this workshop which meets each week, and so far I can already tell that it has truly helped to re-direct my focus to more appropriate responses and a much more peaceful approach.

Of course, part of what made this week so much more relaxing is the fact that I got two of my assignments finished and the third one I have gotten a good start on. (I think all the research I did in the first two weeks is partly why I was so busy.) It is quite refreshing to know that there aren't any late nights ahead of me finishing up these assignments as they are already finished way in advance.

My first assignment was on the therapeutic nursing approach and all the various aspects of that - I found this essay to be incredibly interesting and I was definitely diggin' it! =) New Zealand nursing comes from a very holistic view and I am definitely all about that. I can see how I am going to really love these next three years of study......My second assignment was on the nursing concept of advocacy - also another great essay that I was totally getting into. (Again with the therapeutic approach) I cannot wait to have an opportunity to apply these skills to my own nursing relationships.....Just awesome!

I am really learning so much about myself through my study. (Travis thinks my "self-reflection" is totally hilarious, but in all seriousness I have gained a lot through it.) I started a nursing journal in my first week and it's pretty cool to look back on. I figure after year three I will look back and really see how far I have come in my own personal growth....

One of the techniques from my perfectionism workshop was to practice mindfulness each day this week. While I already do this with my yoga practice, I am adding a new dimension of mindfulness and reflection each day as well. This has definitely helped me to stay focused and to keep a calm mind throughout the day. I have been listening to peaceful music on my ipod as I walk to class in the mornings and stuff and it's so refreshing (although I do chuckle to myself every once in a while when it feels as if my life is "orchestrated" or like I am living with a soundtrack in the background of my life! ha....This thought always makes me laugh.) Anyway, I am trying really hard to add mindfulness to my everyday routine so expect to hear some reflections from this from time to time.....

My running and exercising has really been an awesome "brain break" from studying. I am on week 6 of my 10K training and I have been getting in some really good distance runs. I haven't lifted weights as much, but I guess I just haven't been as motivated to do so - I think I just enjoy running and yoga so much more....I am down to 135 now and that's been holding steady for about a week now. I definitely feel great, although I will confess that uni has increased my caffeine intake. AND....confessions - I have had more lollipops in the past two weeks than probably the past 15 years of my life combined! haha....(I suppose that's not saying too much since I'm not really a candy person, but I have had about four a week, and that's NOT a good habit!) The problem being that having a coffee or a lolli just makes a three hour lecture more endurable......Any suggestions for better choices?

Travis leaves on Monday, which is also hard to believe. I know that the next five months will really go by so fast, but it's still hard to believe he will soon be back in Alaska. He is excited for the fire season to start, and I'm excited for him. It will be kind of nice to have my own space while I study too, so I'm sure there will be some perks to that. We will see how it goes......

Each week I have been creating a mantra for myself, and this was what I wanted to reflect on this week -

"Today, I allow myself to embrace all the qualities that define who I am in this present moment." ~Namaste

Life at Uni

2010-02-23T11:05:00.000-08:00

Well, I have survived my first week at uni and all is well. It has been a wonderful week crammed full of classes and studying. (Crammed is a great word since I am learning all about "cramming" knowledge into my tiny brain! ha) Monday was our first day of class and it started off at 9:00am with a lecture. I have lectures/workshops/tutorials ALL day on Monday until about 5. Because they have to accommodate our schedule to fit in 24 hours of clinical each week (spaced over 3 days) we have everything jam-packed on Monday and Friday. - With a few things thrown in between depending on our clinical schedule.

All of my lecturers are fabulous. Their knowledge and experience is so vast and they have so much to offer us through their own experiences. Everything is web-enhanced here at Massey, so you have all sorts of online aids to help you study etc. They also post all of the lecture slides online where you can print them off and take them to class to write your notes on etc. It's all very organized and extremely beneficial. (Travis bought me a really awesome printer/copier/scanner so it has already been put to great use!)

I am hoping to take a picture of our clinical lab sometime because it is SOOO cool. It is a small building that has been set up like a "fake" hospital. It has wards with real hospital beds and full body mannequins and is like a full-on simulation center. It's like a great big play room where we learn all of our basic skills. For now the lab part is mostly just review for me, but I am really learning a lot from the lectures - even just in the first week!

It is definitely exciting being challenged to look at things in a different way. One of the things that separates Massey from the other schools is that their program is intensely focused on research and "evidence-based practice". This is good for me because I have already done a lot of hands-on work, but have never really learned about the clinical research type stuff. I am very excited about this and anxious to learn in more detail.

As for my diet/exercise this week - I have been really faithful to my 'plan'. I got up every morning at 6am and did yoga and took the time to wake up slowly and relax before walking onto campus. I was able to fit in my lifting/gym workouts in between classes and that worked out really well. I have kept my running up this week as well by running when I get home from school. It's a great way to unwind before diving into my evening study sessions! =) Travis and I did finish the seventh week of the Super Seven Series so that is now over...oh so sad...I have also done a LOT more walking this week since I walk to school and all around campus. I took my lunch to school every day this week (veggie wraps with hummus and heaps of veggies/spinach). I am down to 136lbs so I only have 4 left to go before I hit my bottom weight! My mileage has increased a lot as of late, (I ran my first 7 miler on Sunday!) so I should see those last few pounds drop soon...not too concerned about that, but it will still be a great day when it happens. I have also fit in an evening yoga session each night to unwind after the long days...this definitely helps with relaxation and sleep! =)

Overall, I think that if I can stick to my very detailed schedule I should be able to find balance and stay sane! =) It's been a wonderful first week, and I just have to say that my excitement does continue.....Although I might have to cut down on my amount of study if I plan to do ANYTHING in my life besides read and take notes! haha.....Again, it's still about finding balance and it might take me a week or two to sort that out. =) Unfortunately I am not as blessed as Travis when it comes to studying (He managed to get through West Point by watching Simpsons and Family Guy for study time - as he informed me this evening! ha....must have been nice for him!)

So, that is the overview of my first week at uni!! More to come....

"It is never to late to be what you might have been." ~ Namaste

Thinking about going green?

2010-02-18T10:53:00.000-08:00

I read a post this morning from another blogger friend, Running Green, and it got me thinking about all of my friends out there who are into outdoor sports/running/healthy living etc...who might not be aware of the hazards of a) continuously using bottled water b) using plastic water bottles as an alternative.

Travis came across this warning a few months back regarding polycarbonate plastics and we ditched our HUGE collection of Nalgene bottles and moved to a safer option. We have always been very big into using water bottles in place of bottled water, not only for the environment, but also because I drink heaps of water everyday and I would have to drink probably 5-8 bottles worth! (Can you imagine how much plastic waste that would incur just from me alone!? Think about that....) Not to even mention the cost of all that bottled water.

So...the alternative that Travis found was Klean Kanteen. We made a huge investment (these are not cheap) and purchased these fabulous, stainless steel bottles. We went for the 40oz ones which are perfect for tramping and still a nice size to carry to work/school or wherever. We have been extremely happy with our canteens and would highly recommend the change to anyone reading this.

I know this was kind of a random post, but Vern got me thinking that I should share our experience about this topic as well...Thanks, Vern, for reminding us all to live a little greener! =)

"Today, I choose to give back to the universe and hope for peace and unity for all people." ~ Namaste

Insight Into My Life

2010-02-16T20:42:00.000-08:00

So, as a new student at uni here in New Zealand, I thought I would take a moment to reflect and share my thoughts as I begin this great journey.....

This morning as I was sitting in orientation and hearing them talk about 'welcoming us to our future' as nurses...my throat was actually constricting and I confess that I was feeling really emotional and proud at the prospect of my future. - It is definitely confirmed that I will cry at my graduation! ha...I just feel so honored to have been accepted into the program (especially as an immigrant) and I am so thrilled to be making this huge step in my life. To some this may seem mundane, but for me, it's something huge and amazing!

Let me add here, however, that this feeling of awe and pride and excitement was very short lived as they began talking about the consequence of failure and expectations set for the classes/clinicals. (In NZ if you fail a class you have to wait like a whole year to take it again, and you are only allowed 5 years to complete the whole course, so if you screw up it sets you WAY back and it can become a big nightmare!!) I was prepared for this course to be intense, but I think that part really hit me today as I realized just HOW intense it will truly be! I know that I can handle it, but I also know that this is going to be a huge challenge.

Lucky for me, my fears were calmed a little as the counseling and student services talked about the multiple ways that they are there to help the students throughout the program. This college definitely has some truly amazing programs set in place and I will gladly take advantage of them all!! They have a whole learning center set up where you can go for consultations on your papers etc. (Definitely going to be one of my first stops since I haven't written an essay in like 12 years! - Not to mention the differences in writing styles of the US/NZ...I will be really grateful for the help offered.) They also run workshops on various study skills and that sort of thing which I will be excited to take advantage of.

Let me say here, that I think the instructors are awesome and I am really looking forward to my classes with them. (Esp. Vivien...I met her when I first applied, and I just think she is an amazing lady - can't wait to really get to know her and learn from her!) They also have a lot of wonderful online aids that help (for example, Vivien posts her class power points online so you can print them off later etc...).

We got our clinical placements and start working there after our first four weeks of labs etc. I am in the B Group which means that I will have my labs on Tuesdays and I will be assigned to the Summerset Retirement Village for my rotations in the first semester.

Now, I realize that this post hasn't really been much about weight-loss, running, or healthy living...However, I just wanted to take the time to share about where I'm at in my life and what's happening here. It's all a part of what makes me tick, and therefore, it's all a part of the "healthy lifestyle" I seek...

I was very excited when I tried on my uniform pants today and I was able to order the smaller size! (It just fits well now, so I must work hard to keep in shape!!) While I haven't run the past two days, I am taking this as an opportunity to rest and recoup before school starts. It might take me a bit to get into a really good routine, but I'm determined that I will make time for it, no matter what!

I did try a Madeline special tonight and had a baked sweet potato (kumera) in the microwave with steamed vege on top! Definitely a wonderful meal and very healthy...Yes, you would be correct in guessing that Travis was not here tonight so he missed out on this delicious concoction (somehow I doubt he is too upset by that!)

As my final comment, I do have to say that it is looking more and more like it was a wise decision for Travis to go back and fight fire during the summer. I am going to be swamped and it's probably best if I have the place to myself. I tend to talk out-loud and spread out EVERYWHERE as is evidenced by my apt right now! Not to mention that I love just eating whatever I want - as mentioned above - and having no one else to worry about. I will miss him tremendously, but I'm sure he will be glad not to be around all of my "crazy study" mess!! No doubt, my grades will be better as a result too. Hopefully when he gets back and I finish my second semester we can take a real vacation and enjoy some downtime together.

So, my focus the rest of this week will be on trying not to become too overwhelmed by the impending craziness that will soon be my life....To find peace in these stressful moments and to turn any worry into calm and quiet mindfulness.

"Make every effort to find stillness in the un-restful moments, and peace when your mind is worried." ~ Namaste

Week 2 of 10K Training Down

2010-02-13T10:49:00.000-08:00

Well, the second week of my 10K training program is now complete. I do confess that I did not follow this training fully this week because I felt like I needed to take it a little easier since I have been running so much lately. This week starts up my full-on training schedule since I will be on campus more and getting back into the gym. I am also increasing my yoga practice to twice a day for the sake of starting my days in a calm and clear mind for class. =)

My schedule will go something like this:

AM Yoga (awakening/invigorating) - Class - Gym in the afternoon (alternating lifting and lower body/cross training) - Run (according to my 10K training plan) - PM Yoga (relaxation)

These little workout breaks should help give my mind a rest from lectures and studying. =)

Orientation is this week - Wednesday for the Nursing Program and Friday for my Sciences - so after that I will have a better idea of my class schedule (although with this program I think the schedule changes just about every week.)

Travis leaves for AK in four weeks - I know, it's so hard to believe that it's already here! - Once he takes off my schedule will be a lot more flexible, although, I will be sad not to have him around. (He will be gone for about five months. - so basically through my whole first semester.)

Still not much progress on further weight-loss, but holding steady and feeling great! =)

"If you can imagine it, you can achieve it. If you dream it, you can become it." ~ William Arthur Ward

5th Week of Super Seven Series

2010-02-09T11:01:00.000-08:00

I cannot believe that we only have two weeks left for our 7K series. It will be so sad when it's over. It has been such a fabulous event thanks to the Manawatu Striders. They posted some photos on their website, and hopefully no one will mind that I borrowed them to post on mine. Since we walk to the race every week I haven't been able to bring a camera with me.
This week I ran another PR of 42:46 and Travis finished 8th this week with a PR of 28:18!! It was a little drizzly and cool, so it was perfect running weather. The race is definitely starting to feel more comfortable, so that's awesome. I can tell a huge difference in my running training just in the past five weeks. It's definitely a wonderful way to train!
Travis has been so excited about the sausage sizzle - He looks forward to this every week!
This is my favorite way to end my race - Yum bananas and a big cup of water!! (Don't know how in the world all those people stomach sausages after a run!!)

So, that's the latest on my 7K series. I'm still hovering around 62.5 kg so I don't think I will make it down to my goal weight by the start of school, but I am around my goal measurements so that is really what I was after. (I just didn't want to buy a bigger uniform and then have to wear that for three years. I think I will do fine to get a smaller size now.)

It's hard finding balance because I'm trying to eat so healthy and lose weight, and Travis is trying to gain weight. (He decided yesterday that it's my fault he isn't gaining weight because he isn't "eating normal"!! haha.....This cracked me up - I'm like, "Dude, I cannot force-feed you. If you choose not to eat enough throughout the day that really isn't my deal!" I think he is going to take me up on my suggestion and go to the butcher today and get some choice meats. (I always tell him I will cook him whatever he wants, so I think he is going to try eating more meats and stuff and see if he can gain some weight that way.) I wish this was my problem! haha....

My freezer is really filling up now, and I am so ready for school to start. I will be walking a lot more once class starts so that will be helpful with my training as well. If I have time in my schedule I am thinking of signing up for a 10K in April. It's an off road forest run, and it sounds really fun, so we will see.....

"Focus on mindfulness and tranquility in this present moment, no matter what the day brings." ~ Namaste

Tranquility In Every Moment

2010-02-06T11:10:00.000-08:00

This morning I read a fantastic article that I wanted to share on here. It was, of course, in Yoga Journal. Just click on the link I set up and it will take you straight there. It reminded me today that in every moment, both the pleasant and challenging ones, we can find within ourselves peace and equanimity. If we take a moment to focus on our breath and to find acceptance in that moment we can ride over the wave of uncertainty and can find peace within the changes that we are facing.

"I allow myself to calmly accept all the changes that come in this present moment." ~ Namaste

Yoga just makes everything better

2010-02-04T19:43:00.000-08:00

Travis and I went on a wonderful tramp today to Maharahara Track. It was my day off and I had originally planned to workout/run and make a big pot of chili. I had already soaked the beans so I decided to cook them quickly this morning (I just threw them all into one big pot and cooked them about half their normal time.) I threw them in the crock pot with all the other chili ingredients and decided to just give it a go and see how it turned out. When we got back from our tramp (about 6.5 hours including travel time) our apartment smelled of delicious chili and the soup was perfect with the beans just tender enough but not overcooked. This is definitely the trick if you are going to leave the pot on all day!Anyway, the tramp was so fantastic. It was straight uphill for the first three hours so I think I definitely got my cardio in today. I was actually really surprised at how energetic I felt. This was, by far, the best I have felt tramping yet. I can definitely tell that all of my running is paying off. My legs felt a lot stronger doing all of that climbing. (And let me tell you, it was like doing the "mountain climber" quad workout on an incline!!) Coming down it was quite hard on my joints and I know my knees will be tired tomorrow. I just couldn't believe how much more enjoyable the hike was since I'm in better shape. Not only that, but I also got to wear my orange hiking shorts for the first time which is exciting because they are size 10 and I couldn't even get them on before. They are even a little baggy so they were super comfortable! Yeah!!Okay, so why I am writing this...I just had to comment on how much I love yoga. As I was hiking I was just thinking about how much yoga improves every aspect of your life. Whether it is a matter of making you better athletically (no matter what sport it is - running, swimming, tramping etc...) or whether it is a matter of making you a better person emotionally. My body was so much more flexible and my balance was so much greater on my hike today. This really made it feel so much easier.

I like to make up mantras that seem appropriate in the present moment. As I was tramping today this mantra came to me and I made that my focus throughout the hike: "I allow myself to take time today to find joy in the simple things." By focusing on this I became mindful of the birds singing as we were hiking, of the breeze, of the sunlight floating through the trees, of my wonderful husband whom I'm so blessed to have a relationship with etc....just thinking of all the little things that we take for granted every day.

"I allow myself to take time today to find joy in the simple things." ~ Namaste

Work-a-holic's Anonymous

2010-02-03T12:26:00.000-08:00

Hi, my name is Teniah and I am a work-a-holic....

I came home from work yesterday and was telling Travis about how stressful my day had been because I felt stretched so thin. They had me putting up new displays while tearing down old ones, while re-labeling stock, while serving customers etc...While I am usually good at multi-tasking I just felt stretched really "thin" yesterday. I don't know why, but there was this inner pressure to hurry and get everything done and get it done right. The problem is that they have all of these expectations and we close at 5:30. If you aren't done at 5:30 they say you have to stay and finish and yet you don't get PAID to stay and finish. (Which is where the pressure comes in. If you aren't close to being done at 5:00 you have this panic feeling that you cannot possibly get through by 5:30!!...) Of course, Travis says that I should just tell them that I only get paid until 5:30 and I have to leave - something that is probably correct, and yet, I struggle with the concept of leaving something unfinished.

Travis says this is definitely a sign that I'm heading down that path again - the path of a work-a-holic. (Yes, I have struggled with his a lot in my life - most likely from being raised to always do "above and beyond...always give 110%...always do more...always go beyond what you are asked to do...etc. - While these are good concepts, they do tend to turn one into a bit of a perfectionist!) I do not desire to have this stress in my life. In every other aspect of my life I have such calmness and joy and peace. For some reason, though, when it comes to work I demand so much of myself and try to pick up the slack from my co-workers. (Some of whom could care less about being there and therefore barely work at all.) I do not know what drives me to feel the need to pick up the slack, but something gives me a "panic" feeling and makes me feel that things have GOT to get done....

So.....having laid out my confession before you, I am committed to my "therapy" and I am determined not to let this job bring me down. I want the same equanimity that I have throughout the rest of my life to flow into my work and to be present with me. This should be my New Year's resolution!

If any of you have suggestions for me, please feel free to leave a comment. I will let you know how I get on with this struggle of mine - hopefully the fact that I recognize it early enough will help bring my life back into balance.

"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. " - Reinhold Niebuhr Serenity Prayer

Super Seven Races

2010-02-02T11:15:00.000-08:00

Last night Travis and I joined another 1127 people for the fourth week of our Super Seven Series 7K race. It was a gorgeous night, although pretty hot and really windy. (Unfortunately about halfway through, my suntan lotion started sweating into my eyes and burning...bummer...that sucks when you are trying to focus on your finish!)

The race was great. This was the first time that I actually felt really good through the whole race. Each K mark I was right on target. Between 3K and 4K I fell behind by 8 sec, but then by the time I hit my 5K mark I was right on target again. For some reason I felt winded between 5K and 6K, but the last little bit I really felt energized and kicked it up a notch...Finished 11 seconds faster than my previous record time, and came in this week at a PR 43:11!

Travis wasn't feeling it so much, so he raced the first 4K and then kind of just cruised the last bit. He still finished in 28 min, so that was awesome in my eyes....

This week starts my cool running 10K training program. I am planning to train towards a 10K and beyond in preparation for my 1/2 Marathon training that will start in May. I have a few races that I will hopefully be able to squeeze in during this training period as well.

Mostly my training will consist of two days of running, one day of cross training, three days of running, one day off. It is designed to alternate between speed work, moderate, short distance, and long distance. I think it will be a good plan....We will see, and I will just adapt it as needed.

I am still just focusing on yoga and running until school starts and then I will increase my gym time more. Right now I'm still just getting in about two days of lifting a week. The next two weeks I'm working a ton, so it's just how it is for now. I could push myself and wake up super early, but I'm trying not to start all of that until school starts! ha....Trying to enjoy my last weeks of freedom! =)

My freezer is filling up fast, so that is exciting. I shouldn't need to put away too much more. I tried my hand at a homemade salad dressing yesterday and it turned out really nicely, so I think I will start making my own. Saves some money and definitely cuts back on additives and preservatives! Travis bought me some "bread for women's health" last week at the store and I thought to myself, "Now this man is really starting to 'get' me!!" haha.....The bread has kind of a weird consistency, but it's full of nutrients, omega 3's, soy, linseed etc....lots of nuts and grains....It's good for an evening toast. I just thought it was funny how he bought me this "special" bread! Just remembering this week that everything I take in will directly effect my running, my energy level, and every aspect of my life -

"What is good for the body is good for the whole man." ~ Fred Rohe Zen Running

Bad Omen

2010-01-29T11:19:00.001-08:00

So....I was making my green smoothie this morning when I left the inversion mixer in the container and it tipped the whole thing over!!! Talk about a nasty mess.....dark green slime everywhere (I had only made it so far in the process to have the greens and banana done so it was definitely "slime"....) Hoping this isn't a sign for how my day will go. I am working 12 hours today (between both jobs) so I need better mojo than this.....Just a note to self - Never take your hand off the mixer!

Keeping on Track

2010-01-28T12:26:00.000-08:00

So, since we are close to finishing up the first month in 2010, I thought it appropriate to re-evaluate my New Year's Resolutions and see if I am staying on track.

Things have been really busy around here and will continue to be until I start school. (Then I suppose it will turn into a whole different kind of busy!) I have been working extra shifts, getting my first aid qualifications finished, getting all my medical info in line for school etc. etc.

The challenge has been to continue my exercise routines in the midst of all my chaotic scheduling and trying to spend time with Travis. (He will leave in about 8 weeks so we are trying to enjoy the time while we have it!) I will say that my time at the gym has drastically dropped. I'm only going in to lift about two (maybe three) days a week now. I find it hard considering that I walk to the gym so it's at least an hour and most of the time lately I don't have an hour to run, an hour for yoga, and a hour for the gym....I'm hoping that once school starts this will be easier because I will already be on campus. (My plan is to lift over my lunch break, but we will see how that turns out.)

While I have slacked on my weight lifting, I have been continuously faithful to my yoga practice and my running. My distance run is now up to 6 miles and we have faithfully been running the 7K races every Tuesday (Which, last week I set a PR for coming in at 43:22!!)

On the weight-loss spectrum, I'm down to 138 so only 6 lbs left to go!! Good thing since I only have four weeks left before my challenge ends. Not sure if I will make it all the way, but I'm still trying....

And lastly, my other goal was to cut down on processed bread and jam etc. (since that is like the last thing in my diet that isn't "whole food".) I have swapped for a more healthier/nutty bread with no preservatives (which none of the bread in NZ has anyway) that's about as close as I'm going to get. I only eat it on occasion as a toast at night. I decided that a little jam can be my one vice and I will accept that. I just haven't found a decent substitute yet.

Pretty much my diet consists of a really big breakfast (oatmeal with flaxseed and wheat germ) and a green smoothie (frozen fruits, soy milk, spinach, barley grass, spirulina). I don't get a lunch break until around 2 or 2:30 so that's why I eat such a big breakfast...Lunch is usually something decently filling like a big salad or left over lentil soup/stir fry etc. Afternoon tea I usually have some raisins and seeds (pumpkin/sunflower) and then dinner I usually have a very small portion of whatever I cook because I eat after my evening run and I'm not usually that hungry. Then around 9 I have a piece of toast, or the past two nights Travis and I have been splitting a bag of pop corn....That's pretty much my "usual". I have converted everything to fresh/whole foods and grains and the only thing in our whole house that is pre-made or bottled is the little bit of hoisin sauce used for stir fries and perhaps jelly. We never eat out, so pretty much I would say we have been detoxed of all the preservatives and stuff that we used to eat. I definitely want to continue in that because I cannot begin to say how much better I feel...It's amazing the effect that food has on our bodies/moods/health etc....

So, that's my update after the first month of 2010...How are your resolutions going? What changes do you need to make to get back on track? It's easy after the first month to just loose your focus. Sit down and really evaluate where you are at and decide what changes you need to make to get yourself back on track, or simply to re-commit yourself if you are still on track!!! Share your progress with your friends, start a blog, or start a personal journal. Throw your thoughts out there and see what comes of it! =)

"The strength I feel inside me is enough to sustain me during any experience I have today" ~ Namaste

The Best Pumpkin Soup EVER!

2010-01-25T00:06:00.000-08:00

So, my project the past few days has been to make a lot of things for the freezer in preparation for school starting. Today I made new variation on my pumpkin soup and I thought that this was definitely blog worthy.....Especially for those of you who love to use your crock pot!

Spicy Carrot and Pumpkin Soup

(No picture, because it really ends up just looking like a pureed soup!)

Ingredients:
1/2 pumpkin diced
1/2 squash diced (Or extra pumpkin)
2 large carrots diced (If they aren't big enough, throw in an extra one)
2 potatoes diced (you can sub sweet potato)
1 large onion diced
2 cloves garlic
3 Tbsp flour
2 Tbsp olive oil
1 tsp salt
1/2 tsp curry powder
dash chilli powder
1/4 tsp nutmeg
2 1/2 tsp paprika
3 cups vegetable stock
freshly ground pepper
freshly chopped coriander
coconut milk

Directions:
Soften onion and garlic in oil. Add flour and all pre-diced vege. Coat everything well with the flour and let the flour absorb the oil. Pour everything in crock-pot and add all spices and stock. Cook on low for roughly 6 hours or until vege is tender and falling apart. Add in coriander and coconut milk. (additional, you don't have to add this if you don't have it on hand.) Puree until consistency is creamy or as desired. (You can leave some chunks depending on how you like it.)

Such a beautiful soup and it's really soothing. This is definitely my favorite - I might have to make this again next week and freeze some more!

Progress Report - Starting Week 10

2010-01-23T22:49:00.000-08:00

Today started week 10 in my 14 week challenge. My goal was to get back in great shape before school started and to hopefully get down to 132 so that I could get really well-fitted nursing uniforms.

Looks like the whole vegetarian thing is working out for me in more ways than one - I'm down to 139 so not far off! I am actually almost exactly the same measurements as I was at my very healthiest back in Korea. (Actually my legs are even smaller now.) But because I have built so much muscle through running and yoga, it will take a little more effort to get down to 132 this time around.

The exciting part of losing this weight for me has been that I did not diet or deprive myself. I just changed my whole lifestyle and priorities. I'm eating what is right for my body and that has made all the difference in the world. No more struggling, no more cravings...The changes I have made for myself are lifelong. I am setting goals for myself that I never dreamed possible before (like my desire to run a half marathon in 2010).

While there are those who still make fun of me for going all "healthy" and stuff; I will gladly accept the joking for the reward that I get from feeling great about my accomplishments. (Travis still laughs at me when I drink my "green smooties" in the morning, but I just go about my business and slip into my clothes feeling great that I can wear them so comfortably now!!)

So, the exciting thing for me today was that I tried on my very tiniest pair of hiking pants and they fit!!! They actually fit really nicely too, not tight at all.....These pants were smaller on me even back in Korea and I got them as a light-weight hiking pants there. I have NO idea why I ever kept them, and when I was unpaking stuff here in NZ I could not for the life of me figure out why in the world I even brought them. (At the time I couldn't get them even up past my hips!) We only brought over a suitcase of clothes and a duffle bag so I was frustrated with myself for taking up the space to bring a pair of pants that I couldn't even wear!! Then, this morning I remembered them and thought I would give it a go - What do you know!? Progress is finally taking place and all of my hard work is paying off.

My runs this week have been really nice - some good paces going on and I even got a good six miler in this week too - I have been averaging around 25km (15 miles) a week, so that's exciting progress on that front as well. - I'm looking forward to our next 7K this coming Tuesday and hope it will be a great one.

Tonight for dinner I made home-made pizzas which were fabulous. I made the tomato base from scratch and then topped mine with all sorts of yummy vege and cheese and then Travis got to have his with sausage which made him really happy. I did get the crust from the store because I didn't want to do the whole dough thing today; but overall it was all really healthy. (The breads here don't have preservatives and stuff like in the states, so it was still rather healthy.)

My goal for the next few weeks is to make a lot of freezer food before school starts. I got a ton of fruits that were pretty cheap today and froze them which will be so wonderful for my morning smoothies. Friday I had made a huge pot of soup with different lentils and barley to freeeze, then Saturday morning I had gotten up before work and made a mung bean casserole and I froze most of it, then today I made a lentil soup and froze all of it. (unfortunately the recipe called for spinach and somehow the combo of spinach and lentils really reaked. I mean, it smelled really bad! Bummer..hope it tastes better than it smells...it did look pretty- Travis was VERY happy that this was a freezer food for me later and not our dinner! ha....)

I am taking a first aid class on Tuesday and Wednesday of this week, so it will be a busy week for me.

That's the latest progress report, I will post my next one at the conclusion to my 14 week challenge. After that I begin training for my 10K and 13K races....More to come!

Summer in Palmy

2010-01-18T14:07:00.000-08:00

The weather here in Palmerston North has been totally amazing this week! So warm and sunny and it just makes me want to go to the beach! (Can't convince Travis to go - bummer.)

Last night we had dinner with some friends from church, which was really nice. There were a few others there that we had not met yet, so it was nice to get to know them. One of the girls will be in my nursing program so it was really cool to meet her. Dinner was fabulous (I love how people here cook so healthy...mostly roast meals...we had peas, carrots, roast pumpkin and roast potatoes, an orzo salad - fabulous - and they also served lamb....It was so great having so many vegetable choices because no one even noticed that I didn't eat the lamb!) Lovely dinner and felt great that we were able to still eat a healthy meal!

This is me in my sun dress that Travis bought me to wear in NZ! =) Not the best picture, but you get the idea...

Tonight is our second 7K race in the Super Seven Series so we are both looking forward to that - although we are likely to have heat stroke if the weather holds as it is now! (Our Alaskan natures are just not used to all this warm weather! ha)

The past few weeks I have been focusing on increasing my running distances and really getting in some good yoga sessions every day. I haven't been back at the gym as often as I was before Christmas so I am working on that - just hard to fit in everything, and I would rather make sure I get my yoga and run in...it's a compromise and in an ideal world we would have time for it all, but you know...

I thought I would share a super easy recipe real quick since it has become one of my new favorites! I have been drinking green smoothies every morning with my breakfast and continuing to eat really healthy, so I'm very happy with how that's coming together. I am down to 64kg this week so very happy with that as well. (Still a little ways to go, but I'm content on taking it slow.)

Chickpeas and Roast Vegetable Couscous

Ingredients:

Combination of diced vegetables of choice: I chose root vege like kumera, carrots, parsnips (my first time EVER eating or cooking these - and I LOVE them!) potato (if using a white potato you will want to boil them a little first...mine did not cook fully) onion, red pepper, and cauliflower
Chestnuts, Almonds, or Cashews - I just tossed a handful in with the roast vege
Olive Oil
Dried Sweet Basil and Oregano
Chickpeas
1/2 Cup couscous
125ml Vegetable Stock
1 tsp paprika

Directions:
I adapted this recipe from some other ideas, so it's really basic. Just coat all vege and nuts in olive oil and dried herbs, salt/pepper. Turn into a casserole dish and roast in oven on 200c stirring occasionally to cook evenly. I cooked mine for about an hour, but just watch and remove when all vege is roasted thoroughly. Cover 1/2 cup couscous with hot vegetable stock and mix in the 1 tsp paprika. Let sit covered for about 5 min. until couscous absorbs the liquid. Mix the chickpeas and couscous with the roasted vege and serve!! It is fabulous and makes a ton!

I served this on the side of a pesto pasta (fresh basil, garlic, pine nuts, cashews, olive oil, and Parmesan cheese pureed into a pesto) and for Travis I served chicken as well. Makes a lovely dinner! (Next time I will steam some asparagus or broccoli because I felt like it could have used some more greens on the side.)

"What is good for the body, is good for the whole man" ~ Fred Rohe Zen Running

Enter to win a FREE yoga mat bag!

2010-01-14T17:54:00.000-08:00

I found this amazing website through another great blogger, and wanted to share.....LaRae is a yoga and pilates instructor and she started designing and sewing all of these fantastic items that are used for relaxation/yoga/even cooking!! Her website is awesome, and the items she sells are truly beautiful as well as reasonably priced. Check this website out if you want something nice to treat yourself, or as a really nice gift. The website is yogagrrlie and you can read all about LaRae's projects and see the various items she makes.Also, if you want to win one of her yoga mat bags, check out Monica's blog and enter to win!!

Fabulous Lentil Quiche

2010-01-13T22:53:00.000-08:00

So, I promise that all of my blogs aren't going to be food related in 2010, but I have seriously been coming across some amazing recipes that I have to share! This one is a really neat twist on your traditional quiche. (The thing I love about it is there is no pastry!!)

I made this when I got home from work tonight and it was fabulous!! Travis' first comment was, "There's a lot of green in here!" but he asked for a second piece and seemed to really like it......Because it takes over an hour to make, I served a pumpkin dahl for an appetizer. (I had made that a while back and froze it. I chopped up some chicken in Travis' for him and he was content to wait for the quiche to finish.)

Lentil Quiche

Ingredients:

1 chopped onion
2 Tbsp olive oil
2 cups chopped broccoli (roughly about one big bunch)
1 chopped tomato (next time I might try sun-dried tomatoes so you could substitute that.)
1/2 cup dried lentils
4 eggs beaten
1 cup milk
dash nutmeg
salt and pepper to taste
chopped fresh herbs - parsley, basil, coriander
dash of dried oregano
dash of dried sage
1/2 cup shredded cheese - Parmesan and mozzarella (just what I had)

Directions:
Pre-heat oven to 350F or 190C. Stir-fry the onion in oil until softened and set aside in a bowl. Using the same pan add lentils and cover with water. Bring to a boil - about 15 min. or until just tender, but not fully cooked - Drain access water off until just a small amount is remaining. Return to stove and add broccoli on top. Put a lid on the pan and let the broccoli steam while the lentils soak up the remaining liquid - about 5 min. Stir all vege together with cheese and pour into a greased deep dish pie plate (maybe two?) or a small casserole dish. Whisk together eggs, milk, all spices and herbs. Pour over vegetables. Bake for 40-45 min. or until set. Let cool for 5 min. before serving.

Healthy choices, mean healthier futures ~ Namaste

Super Seven Series

2010-01-12T13:16:00.001-08:00

Last night was the first 7K race in a seven week series here in Palmerston North. I finally convinced Travis to go along and race with me, and it turned out to be a really wonderful event! So glad he went. We had a lot of fun together and it was great walking home and talking about the event!

We decided to walk to the race since it is only about 1 1/2 miles from our apt. (We figured this would be a great warm up/cool down as well.) We got there way early because we had been warned that the crowds could make for long lines during registration etc. We were some of the first there, so our numbers reflect our "early bird" mentality - Travis was #7 and I was #8 - There were 1,095 who turned up to race last night!! It was a great turn out.

The weather was actually rather chilly at first (we were both sporting our Texas A&M sweatshirts - courtesy of Kari Howell - so I'm sure we stood out as Americans! ha...) We tossed the sweatshirts right before the race and it turned out to be perfect running weather! (cloudy and a bit cool)

The race was fantastic. The only other two races I have run were both really small and I always was running alone (usually in the back). This race was different in that regard, because there were a lot of other runners around my speed that I could pace off of, and quite a lot that I passed! =) It felt great, and I really enjoyed running in a group like that - very motivational and keeps your mind focused elsewhere.

Travis definitely was rockin' it yesterday and placed 13th out of 1,095!! He clocked 28:24 so was cooled off and had finished his bratwurst by the time I crossed the finish at 43:42! =) I was still very happy with this time, as my goal was to finish in under 45.

Overall the whole event was just spectacular - great turn out, great organization, well marked, great route etc...Kudos to the Manawatu Striders and thanks!

We will be back out there next Tuesday night for another great race.

"Running is a big question mark that's there each and every day. It asks you, 'Are you going to be a wimp or are you going to be strong today?'"

Some Healthy Choices

2010-01-11T16:57:00.000-08:00

For all of you who have been emailing me about recipes, I am posting two really nice ones that make a wonderful lunch dish. You can also serve either dish as a side for your main course.

Indian Chole

I just made this today to have for lunches this week. I will warn you that it is extremely spicy. If you aren't into spicy food, I would highly recommend that you use less green chillies and less chilli powder! =) It is really delicious though.

Ingredients:

1 small bowl of cooked chick peas (roughly 1 1/2 cups)
1 large tomato diced
2 handfuls of chopped coriander
1 large onion diced

For Paste:

1 medium tomato chopped
2 spoonfuls of tomato paste
1 onion
4-5 green chillies
1 tsp cumin seeds
1-in strip ginger
2 cloves garlic

2 Tbsp sunflower oil (or olive)
2 bay leaves
1/2 tsp cinnamon or a little extra
3 cloves
1 1/2 tsp red chilli powder
2 tsp coriander powder
1/2 tsp turmeric powder
1/4 tsp stevia (or 1 tsp sugar)
1 tsp garam masala
Salt to taste

Directions:

Blend together tomato, one onion, cumin seeds, chillies, cinnamon and cloves to make a paste using a little water. Set aside.

Heat oil in large frying pan (or electric skillet) and add the bay leaves. Add the diced onion and fry until golden brown. Now add the tomato paste mixture and fry for a few more minutes. Add the dry powders (chilli, turmeric, sugar, coriander, and masala). Now add the chopped tomato and coriander and bring to a soft boil.

Boil for 5 minutes and serve with chapati bread as a side dish, or on top of rice for a main course.

Lentil and Coriander Soup

Ingredients:

1 Tbsp sunflower oil (or olive)
2 cloves garlic - minced
1 1/4 tsp cumin seeds
Pinch of cayenne pepper
1 1/8 Cup brown lentils
1 small onion, cut in half
1 bay leaf
4 Cups of water (more or less depending)
Salt to taste
Freshly ground pepper
Freshly chopped coriander leaves

Directions:

Add all ingredients to your crock-pot, turn on high, and let it go!! Depending on your machine, it may take a few hours. The amount of water you use will depend also on your machine. The first time I made this using 5 cups of water, but that was too much. Soup is finished when lentils are tender. Remove onion and bay leaf.

Coarsely puree the soup with an immersion blender, or scoop a little out and blend in your food processor. Return the blended paste to the soup for thickening. Serve with a large portion of chopped coriander and a dollop of yogurt if desired. This is a delicious soup, although I admit that it isn't very pretty. =)

I took this to work all last week, and it is great with a little hummus and vege on the side!

Happy cooking this week, everyone!

You are what you eat ~ Namaste

Finding Peace and Equanimity in Challenging Moments

2010-01-09T21:32:00.001-08:00

My focus today has been to quiet my mind in moments of struggle and to find a sense of calm in challenging moments.

1) During my weight-lifting session this afternoon I was definitely challenged. Mostly in the last 5 min. when I finished my gym workout with my usual core routine. (It's a 5 min. session of holding bridge where you alternate sides every 30 sec. without ever coming out of the posture.) It was so challenging but in that moment I was breathing calmly and reminding myself of this focus until the last second passed and the challenge had ended.

2) During my six mile run this afternoon I kept this focus at the fore-front of my mind thinking about how I could release tension and just relax and enjoy the run...constantly reminding myself to "let go" in that moment and to breathe through the challenge.

3) Finally, as I released the strain from my various workouts today in a wonderful and relaxing yoga session; I focused once again on finding equanimity and calm in that moment. It all comes full circle here - through yoga.

The reason for my focus today is to hopefully carry this thought with me throughout the week. When I am feeling stressed at work, or challenged by any number of things; I will try to bring my thoughts back to the moment of "letting go" and the feeling of peace within the challenge.

For those working on adding those healthy additions to your diet, I include here a wonderful hummus recipe that is fantastic with raw vegetables or healthy crackers for a snack!!

Sun-Dried Tomato Hummus

1 15 ounce can chickpeas, drained (or I just cook about a cup dried beans)
1/4 cup olive oil
1/4 cup sun-dried tomatoes
Juice of lemon (or about 2 Tbsp lemon juice)
3 cloves garlic
1/2 tsp paprika
2 tbsp tahini (If you have trouble finding tahini, just substitute water. I just love tahini.)
1/4 tsp salt

Add all ingredients to your food processor and voila! (You may need to add a little water depending on your preference for consistency.) I have been taking this to work with a few organic rice cakes and some lentil soup for lunch! =) Yum....

Focus your mind on the present moment and finding equanimity even in the most challenging situations. ~ Namaste

Vegetable Kashmiri

2010-01-07T11:19:00.000-08:00

Last night I made a wonderful Indian curry dish that was so fantastic. I thought I would share it here since I have been talking about healthy living and vegetarian eating etc.....I served this over brown rice and also made Travis a side bowl of ground beef and sausage I just poured his meat mixture - which I added a little green chilli and oil to - over the rice and then topped with kashmiri. He loved it.

Vegetable Kashmiri

2 tsp cumin seeds ground - or use half cumin seeds and half ground cumin

fresh ground pepper

2 cardamom pods - seeds only

2 in. cinnamon stick ground - or about a 1/2 tsp of ground cinnamon

1/2 tsp grated nutmeg - or substitute extra cinnamon or allspice

3 Tbsp olive oil

1 inch fresh ginger root

1 fresh green chilli

1 tsp chilli powder

1/2 tsp salt

2 large potatoes - cut into tiny cubes

8 oz cauliflower - in small pieces

8 oz broccoli or other vege - last night I used broccoli and peas

2/3 cup natural yogurt

2/3 cup vegetable stock

Toasted flaked almonds and fresh coriander

Grind all spices together. Heat oil in a large skillet or pot (keep in mind how much vege you are cooking so you have room to stir!) and fry the chilli and ginger for 2 min. Add the chilli powder, salt and ground spice mixture and cook for 2-3 min. Stir in the potatoes and cover and cook for 10 min. (if needed, add a little of the vegetable stock if spices are sticking to pan. I have found that if you add just a little stock gradually it keeps it all flowing.) Add the other vegetables and cook 5 min. Add the yogurt and stock. Bring to a boil and reduce heat. Simmer 20 min until vegetables are tender and serve garnished.

Changing your eating habits forever

2010-01-04T16:00:00.000-08:00

I dedicate this blog today to everyone out there who has ever tried dieting and found that after a while all the progress that was made is now regressing and slowly slipping away. (This has been me throughout my whole life....I have done Weight Watchers, South Beach Diet, Cabbage Diet, Detox Diet, etc. etc. etc....) I have tried everything and with each diet that I went on I had great success followed by the inevitable return of the weight....

So, as many of you know, I have gradually moved into a vegetarian lifestyle over the past 6 months or so. I read a wonderful book called The China Study that really opened my eyes to lifestyle choices and the things we chose to feed our bodies....I have also watched various movies such as Food Inc. (which if you haven't seen, you DEFINITELY should) and have done a lot of research on healthy living and lifestyle choices.

I have made some serious changes in my life and it seems that there are others out there who wish to do the same this year. I wanted to do a post on "How to change your eating habits forever". I'm not a professional and I don't claim to know the answers, but I just wanted to share what worked/is working for me. I hope that something here will inspire you to seek the path of health for your future.

Firstly, you must have a passion and motivation for change. Why is it that you want to change your eating habits? Do you really know what is bad and good for you to eat? Do you really know the impact that food has on your health and life? Where is your passion for this change coming from? Take some time to ask yourself these questions and really contemplate your answers. Until you identify your motivation I think that change will not only be difficult, but very likely it will not be forever....To make a change that will last forever it has to really mean something to you personally. You have to feel that it really is "life or death" and it has to hold that kind of motivation for you. Wanting to lose weight is NOT motivation enough to make a change that will last forever. It has to mean something more...

Secondly, you must identify the easy habits to kick. If you know right off the bat that you could easily give up cheese because you don't really like it anyway, or bread, or meat, or alchohol or whatever it is....give that up first! Then move onto the harder stuff....Once you identify the reasons you have for quitting it is so much easier to give it up...I just gradually took this approach with each thing - coffee, chocolate, meat, sugar, etc....I identified why it was bad for me, what it was doing to my body, how I would feel if I gave it up, what it would mean for my life and future if I did etc.....Once you start seeing the results in your life you get excited about it and want to eliminate more and more things! (For example, after giving up caffeine and chocolate my headaches started going away! I am definitely excited about spending less of my life suffering and more of it living...This has motivated me to eliminate other things as well)

Thirdly, you cannot give something up without replacing it. (Depriving yourself only makes your lifestyle choices more of a diet than really a change.) In order to make these changes last forever you have to find something that will satisfy you in the same way. For example, to satisfy the need for sugar you might eat fruit or something with a natural sweetness. The way I felt less deprived when giving up meat was to treat myself to new foods and buying new ingredients. I had never cooked with legumes or grains like bulgar wheat and stuff. I had never even heard of cardamom pods and never dreamed of cooking with ginger enough to buy a whole root of it! Basically when I moved to NZ I started a whole new pantry and I took that time to fill it with only the good stuff! I don't cook with flour or lard or anything like that anymore, I have a huge selection of grains, beans/legumes, spices, herbs etc...If a recipe calls for cream or something that I know my body doesn't like, I skip it and find a new recipe! Look for recipes that are totally different than what you are used to making and it will add a new element of excitement to these lifestyle changes.

For me the key is not buying it....I never buy sweets or candy or chocolate or cakes or anything like that, I never buy ice cream or cereals or snack foods like granola bars. I just don't buy it!! If I need a snack I eat a few raisins and some pumpkin seeds or some carrots or something. After the first month of getting past all the cravings I don't even need snacks anymore. I feel totally satisfied with what I have eaten and I hardly ever crave sweets. (I think that part is directly related to my lack of meat intake though.) I have never felt healthier and more energetic. I don't have any pain like I used to have, and I just feel refreshed. If you are offered a small chocolate or a bit of cake or something, you can feel awesome about indulging in that since it may have been months since you had a treat. And you can enjoy it knowing that it isn't part of your every day lifestyle and therefore a small bit isn't going to hurt you. =) I think it makes the indulgence even more intense.

The biggest part for me is finding things to cook that will attract my husband to eat them! (he is definitely a meat eater!!) I have found that he totally loves Indian food and Mediterranean and Middle-Eastern so I stick with a lot of recipes like that. I do a lot of soups where I can make some meat on the side for him, and I also just adapt things....if he ever complains (which is very rare) I just use the reasoning "I'm trying to save money, love; it's so much cheaper to cook without meat!" He has no response to that and will usually smile politely and recognize that I'm trying to honor his desires to save money! =) And yes, it is true - meat is so much more expensive...especially if you are buying organic meat! If you have children I would encourage you to start NOW to help them eat healthier and make better food choices.I think that as a parent you have a wonderful opportunity to help your children learn how to eat things that will help them grow happy and strong and help them avoid the many pit-falls of our American diet.

I hope that this helps to motivate you to make life changing choices for your future, not just a quick fix diet for today......It's about what is going to help you live a healthier, happier, longer life! It definitely takes dedication to do an overhaul on your diet like this, but I think that it is well worth the sacrifice. I promise that if you commit to changing your eating habits for life, it WILL bring life back to you!!! It won't be a diet that you have to constantly be starting over, it won't be an up and down road, it will just be your new lifestyle, and it will be so worth it!!! If you need encouragement, please feel free to write me. By making these changes for myself it has changed my life, and I hope that you will find the same to be true.

We all feel, struggle, laugh, and cry...We are a supreme universal spirit ~ Namaste

Progress

2010-01-04T15:45:00.000-08:00

So, I just wanted to share that the gym opened again today after the holiday break and I got to weigh in - roughly 142lbs (64.5kg) - I am so excited!!! I am really starting to feel a huge difference. I am down to the very last 10lbs and my goal was to hit the mark by the start of school...That leaves me 7 more weeks since I am half way through my 14 week challenge! Definitely doable!!! Yeah for progress!!!

"The pictures you hold in your mind form the reality of your existence." ~ Namaste

2010 New Year/New Passion

2009-12-31T14:08:00.000-08:00

Continuing in true New Year's traditional fashion, this blog will contain goals/resolutions for the coming year.

My hope for each of you is that the start of a new year will bring excitement for all that you hope to accomplish, encouragement to start fresh, and a desire for new and better living choices in your life!

While I have already previously stated my goals for 2010 in regards to running and yoga, I want to take this time to focus on my resolution towards diet and healthy living.

I started gradually eliminating meat from my diet many months ago, and for the past two months I have been eating completely vegetarian. My goal for 2010 is to continue this eating habit but to take it to the next level. My body just responds so much better to a vegetarian diet and I feel a huge difference. I have been trying so many new recipes and enjoying the experiment of new grains/legumes and I want to continue down that path. I have given up sugar and chocolate and caffeine (with the exception of my tiny soy flat white which I have once a week.) My next phase is to give up all processed food. Right now the only real processed food that I eat is bread and salad dressing, but I want to eliminate even that. I want to eat more raw foods and focus on learning more about the various health benefits from vitamins/minerals that I eat. As I begin my nursing program, my study of nutrition will no doubt make me a better nurse as well.

Through yoga, I hope to gain a sense of balance and peace to carry with me each day and to embrace the present moment and the challenges that will come in those moments. Through running, I hope to gain strength and confidence within myself to accomplish that which I hope to achieve. Through diet, I hope to become healthier within my own body so that I can reach my goals for physical fitness and better focus for my studies. My desire is that together all of these will work towards creating a healthier/happier lifestyle.

I am so excited as I look towards this next year and all that it will bring. There will be so many challenges along the way, and yet I look forward to facing those challenges with a calm mind and with acceptance in that moment.

May each of your desires for 2010 come to pass, and may you embrace each moment with peace and calmness of mind! ~ Namaste

See It Done

2009-12-18T11:03:00.000-08:00

I read this great book recently - which I have mentioned before...The 5 Rules of Thought - In that book it says that once you have set a goal for yourself you should spend some time each day meditating on the end result of that goal in order for it to become a reality. You should, in all ways, "See It Done".

In my mind I have a picture of the healthy body that I want to have and of myself running races and crossing the finish line. Every day I spend time meditating on this image and seeing the inside of my body healthy and whole. I think about this as I walk into the gym, as I warm up and get ready for my run etc.....

Secondly he also talks about once you have that goal in your mind and are meditating on it then you must do everything in your power to see it become a reality. It will not just happen on it's own. You must put forth the effort to see it completed. Taking that into consideration I have increased my mileage every week and the intensity at which I work out. I have been faithful to eating healthy and de-stressing every day.

As a result the weight is finally starting to drop off. I'm confident that it's a combination of everything, but either way I am very excited that I may actually stand a chance of meeting my goals to get back to the "healthy me" that I was at one time. This week I hit 145lbs and since October I have lost 14.5 inches in combination! I am overwhelmed by how strong my body feels and how great I feel in general. I don't have the headaches that I used to, and my other health problems have not been bothering me at all!

Just wanted to share that as I come upon the end of the year I'm excited that my goals are close at hand. I still have 13 lbs that I would like to lose between now and February, and I definitely have big goals for my running in 2010. But I must say that it is encouraging to finally start seeing results.

Set a goal, then "See It Done"!!! ~ Namaste

Cultivating a Healthy Life

2009-12-14T16:58:00.000-08:00

Many of you know that my grandfather had triple bi-pass surgery a few weeks ago. Heart disease, obesity, and Alzheimer disease, among other health problems runs on both sides of my family. These are not things I want to ever deal with in my life, and I am determined to break the chains and create my own destiny. (I honestly believe that healthy living has the power to do this!)

I'm sure you have heard the saying, "You are what you eat". I really believe this is a statement of truth and that you can change your own health by dedicating yourself to major lifestyle changes. It's not something that is easy to adjust to (especially in the American culture.) but it is definitely worth the effort. Over the past few months my diet has changed drastically and I am continuing to make adjustments. Since arriving in New Zealand our access to fresh produce and organic food has been totally amazing. I am so grateful for this change. (Access to fresh fruits and vegetables in the remote areas of Alaska is virtually unheard of. - unless, of course, you have a green house in the few short summer months.)

The reason I bring up this topic is because of how different I feel. Today as I was walking home from the gym I was amazed by just how great I felt. It's hard to put into words, but my body feels "whole" In comparison to what I felt before. I do not know exactly what to attribute this to (Not sure if it's a certain food I have given up, or a combination of things), but I am here to say that eating healthy is definitely life changing.

I have been reading a lot of books lately on our toxic environment and cancer and health related issues. I am shocked, really, by the things that we willingly consume and surround ourselves with on a daily basis that we KNOW are killing us! How often do we eat something because it's so good in the here and now; but deep down we know that we will suffer from it later? I know I have done this many times in my past - never again! - For example, I am lactose sensitive and I KNOW that drinking milk, eating ice cream, eating a lot of cheesy food etc. is bad for me. I KNOW what it makes me feel like. Yet, somehow I eat it anyway - what is up with that? At what point do we wake up and realize that our long-term health is so much more important than our short-term pleasure?

After saying all of that, I also make note of the fact that once you kick the habit of something (which I have heard takes 40 consecutive days) you seriously do not crave it in the same way that you used to. I was so addicted to coffee that when I was in highschool I had a coffee pot in my room! No joke....I would drink tons of coffee all day long, every day! Kicking that habit was really hard, but gradually I did and I cannot tell you how much better I feel! The same thing goes for Dt. Coke - wow, what a difference this one made! - Giving up meat also helped me in turn to give up sugar. (When I eat meat it tends to trigger some kind of need for sugary desserts.) These are just a few examples. They were hard adjustments at first, but now I don't crave them or notice their absence at all.

These are just some observations that I have made in my own life this week. I am determined to carry these healthy lifestyle changes with me throughout my life and I hope that you will make some changes in your own diet as well. It will change your life forever! Cancer and disease are so prominent in our culture that it sometimes feels like people have given up the fight and are just willing to accept that it is just part of life - I am NOT willing to accept this for my future and I want to take whatever preventative measures that I can NOW. Hope you feel the same and will make the needed adjustments in your own lives. It's time we took responsibility for our own health and our future! No one can make these changes for us.

Namaste

Finding Focus

2009-12-10T21:47:00.001-08:00

This week I have been doing a lot of "focused" work outs and have been thinking a lot about the goals and ambitions that I have for my future. It has been a great week, and I feel that I have been renewed with the energy needed to meet my desired goals.

Last night I planned out my 2010 training plan and that was really motivational for me. I found several races - 7K, 10K, 13K, and Half Marathon - that I want to compete in throughout the year. My training will be towards the goal of 10K, but eventually I will train for a Half Marathon in August. I feel like in 9 months I should be ready for the big race.

More than just working out a plan, I have been focusing on the biggest challenge of all - The Mind - I read a wonderful book this week called, The 5 Rules of Thought, and it was very enlightening. Just to remind me to focus on what I want to accomplish and "see it done". To think positively about my goals, because you will indefinitely become that which you think you will be. It is amazing what the mind can do...

Also, I have been reading a lot of yoga books and taking my yoga practice to a new level. I feel like my life is really balanced right now and that is bringing healing to my life. My desire is for this "balance" to continue even in the midst of the more stressful moments once I start school. It is easy to get caught up in the challenges of the moment, and my desire is to stay non-reactive during those times.

It has been a great week - technically I still have one more day before week 3 is finished, but I wanted to blog tonight...

"You are what your deep, driving desire is. As your desire is, so is your will. As your will is, so is your deed. As your deed is, so is your destiny."

Week 3 of 14

2009-12-06T11:29:00.000-08:00

The challenge continues - This week my real struggle was my silly hip that keeps bothering me. My right hip seems to be fighting against my desire to improve and increase my running distance. I believe this pain is from over training, and therefore this week I took a break from running and did the stationary bike every day instead. My hip seems to be healing from that, but still is weak.

My focus this whole week has been on strengthening exercises for all the muscles which support my hip. I have incorporated this into my daily yoga practice as well as my work outs. Hopefully it will make a difference.

Yesterday we did a 7 hour tramp up a steep mountain. (It was up hill most of the way with an occasional area of slight incline.) I was really worried about overdoing it on my hip so I tried really hard not to put too much pressure on it. I think by this focus I was able to accomplish that because my hip is feeling fine today. - Although as a consequence my knees are sore! I guess you just can't win until your body's muscles are ready to handle what you give them...

I feel great and felt like this past week was a good one despite my setbacks. This week I am continuing with my focus on healing and strengthening for my hip, but I will also try gradually bringing running back into the picture. (I still REALLY want to make a 5 miler by the end of December, and I'm getting so much closer!)

Week 2 of 14

2009-11-27T11:09:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow will be the start of my second week of intense workout. This week was amazing...Having the time to put in really makes a difference. I have been working out between 2 and 3 hours a day with a variety of stuff from running/lifting/abs/yoga etc.....My muscles feel great. My legs are incredibly sore right now from so many lunges etc, but they will heal today as it is my FREE day. Tomorrow they should be ready to go again! - While I know this kind of work out isn't really sustainable, I want to build a strong base while I can. Besides, I will still try to keep most of it up once school starts by integrating in 1/2 hour sessions here and there throughout the day as "brain breaks"......We will cross that bridge when we get there.

Not much weight loss progress - I am only down to 68kg (roughly 149lbs) but at least I am under the 70kg threshold where I have stayed for a while. Mostly I have been gaining muscle. While I haven't lost much weight I actually look different and I feel great about that. It feels like my goals are really starting to come into reach. I still have about 17 lbs to loose, but I think that it is definitely doable.

Still holding true to my no sugar/no chocolate deal. I have successfully cut down to one latte a week now and no coffee. I have some green tea during the day and one cup of earl grey in the mornings, but otherwise I am off caffeine which feels great as well.

On and even brighter note, I have been cooking a lot of vegetarian meals lately and have convinced Travis to cut down on meat as well!!! (He gives it up really reluctantly so I still cook him some on the side most days.) I am certainly not a "strict" vegetarian, but eating more grains/legumes/vegetables etc makes a huge difference for me and I love it!

The other changes I have made is that I have cut way back on my alcohol intake. (While I never drank much anyway, it's still a change.) I don't even buy wine much anymore and if I do I just have a small glass every few days. It's been at least three weeks since I had a glass now.....Not giving it up for any reason other than to save money! haha.....I guess it still counts.

14 Week Challenge

2009-11-21T13:04:00.000-08:00

Well, I found that due to traveling around so much I couldn't really stick with my Body for Life challenge. I have been really faithful to running and yoga though so I have seen some great results from that. Not sure how much weight I have lost, but I can definitely tell my body is tightening up so that's awesome.

So, here is my new challenge since I am in a home now (well, apt.) and can stick to something more solid......It's 14 weeks until I start school so this is my challenge to stick to my program until school starts and by then I will have a good base to branch off and work out a new schedule at that point.

I found that BFL just doesn't have enough running involved so I am adapting my own program based on the "concept" of some of the principals I learned from BFL. Plus I want to try a new lifting routine so we will see how that goes......

I have a detailed schedule, but will spare you the details: suffice it to say that I will be running four days a week, (mixture of distance and speed) lifting upper body twice a week and lower body twice a week with two days of cross training at the gym (bike/elliptical) and one free day a week. Each day I also have a selected yoga practice to complete and abs interspersed. It's a lot, but I basically have a lot of free time right now so it's no big deal.....

That's where I'm at right now......Eating TONS of fresh vege and fruit and cooking a lot of grains etc. Really focusing on healthy meal choices and loving the availability of produce here!!!

Update

2009-11-12T10:00:00.000-08:00

Well, we are back in Napier for the weekend. It was a great three weeks of working and looks like all that outdoor labor paid off with a few pounds shed. I'm down two more pounds. Although it's not much, it counts for something!!!

It's been hard to cut back on food intake when you are working so much because you need that extra energy....It all balances out. Everything we have been eating has been very healthy and consists a lot of eggs and toast - our staple while WWOOFing! haha......

Still running faithfully and doing my yoga so things are going well. Hopefully the weight will drop off gradually and soon I will be back in shape again! =)

Week Four

2009-10-31T20:14:00.000-07:00

Okay, so technically I should be starting my fourth week on my Body For Life program. However, since we decided to start WWOOFing (Willing Workers On Organic Farms) - see my other blog for info on that - it has really thrown a wrench into my workout program because I am no longer able to go to the gym and lift weights......

So, in the mean time I am going back to running two days on, one day off. Gradually I want to increase my distance to 5 miles, but right now I am averaging between 3-4 a day. I have been really faithful to running and have been embracing the challenge of running in the rural country side.

The other big change has been my yoga. I have been really faithful to doing my yoga on a regular basis now. I am doing shorter sessions for now (around 30 min. on most days and then 60 min. on the days that I do "power" yoga) I decided that if I didn't have to do 90 min. then it would be a lot easier to stick with it EVERY day. Some days I even do it twice a day. This has been really big for helping me not be so sore when I'm doing harder outdoor labor. (I admit that I am NOT used to outdoor labor! haha.) Last week there was this one day that I weeded for four hours and my body was so incredibly sore and I just ached all over. I was so tired, but I did some yoga that night and was totally shocked when I woke up the next morning and was barely even sore!!! Yoga is amazing......

My diet has been challenging since we aren't really living in a situation where you can control your food......Basically instead of being able to eat small amounts all through the day, I only get to eat three meals so they are a little larger than I would normally eat. Still very healthy though, as all the places we have stayed so far eat very organic and healthy - lots of veggies!!! YES - Last week the host made dessert each night though so that sucked because it was so good and so hard to stick to my plan!!! (I allowed my self to cheat, but only to cheat SMALL.) Luckily we only had dinner there three nights. - She was a great cook though!!

Not planning to weigh myself until I get back to Napier, so we will see how that works out......Just trying to be faithful to myself and not be too hard on myself either. I won't be posting every week since I really won't have a way to tell if I'm making progress. Just updating on Daily Mile.

Week Two

2009-10-18T13:02:00.000-07:00

It's been another great week on Body for Life and I am feeling so healthy and strong. I love eating healthy like this without all the processed foods and sugars, it just makes me feel lighter.

I ran really well this week and felt like I am finally past the "struggling" phase of my running. I am dedicated to keeping it strong and being faithful to my running so as not to have to go through the starting point again!! I am hoping that my health will hold out this time and allow me to keep with it.

Being back and in the gym is amazing and I totally love it. My only concern is that if I cannot stay in the gym I won't be able to stick to such a strict lifting program. Right now I'm doing a lot of weight lifting and I want to stay faithful to that, so my hope is that things will continue in this way...we will see.

This week I only lost one pound, but that's good considering that I'm probably putting weight on from lifting. I feel stronger and leaner, but the scale doesn't show that much difference.

It's really all about staying faithful to a healthy lifestyle and right now I'm meeting that goal so I'm happy.

Healthy Enchiladas

2009-10-16T16:11:00.001-07:00

So, last night I made these amazing enchiladas for dinner and it turned out so well that I thought I would share the recipe since it's such a healthy version.....WARNING - it's very spicy. If you want to cut down the heat I highly recommend starting off with just 1Tbsp chilli powder and then adjust it accordingly. Of course, Travis loved it spicy.....Plus, there was enough sauce to freeze and use next time!!

Sauce:

2 Tbsp olive oil

2 Tbsp Flour (I used wholemeal flour)

2 Tbsp chilli powder

1/2 tsp cumin

1 Cup tomato sauce

2 Cups water

1/4 tsp garlic powder - or minced garlic

Heat oil, stir in flour and chili powder. Cook 1 min. Add remaining ingredients and boil for 10 min. Pour 1/4 of sauce in bottom of pan.

Inside:

1 lb beef (I only used half and froze the other half)

1 small onion

6 whole wheat tortillas

2 cups shredded cheese (You actually need less than one)

1 can sliced olives
1/2 red pepper

1 can black beans

spinach

oregano

1 chopped tomato

Brown the beef with some ground oregano and then set aside. Mix the black beans with oregano, chopped tomato, red pepper and onion as a mixture. Set aside. Coat the tortillas in the remaining sauce and fill with either beef or bean mixture and cheese. (for mine I did just the black bean mixture with spinach....for the guys I did the meat mixture and then also added some of the bean mixture to theirs.) Cover with remaining sauce and olives and cheese. (I didn't use very much cheese, just enough to decorate.)

Preheat oven to 175c and cook until bubbly. Serve with brown rice on the side and some freshly chopped parsley or cilantro.

Anyway, this was a wonderful meal and just thought it would be worth sharing since it's so good for you!! Enjoy!

Week One

2009-10-11T12:44:00.000-07:00

So, my first official week of following a strict exercise program - Body for Life - is finished! (I say that assuming that you know I have been working out for a year so far, this is just a NEW program that I am one week into! And while I mentioned the start of a 12 week program two weeks ago, I didn't actually get to stick with that because we spent a week hiking and stuff....So, I started it over this week and I am now calling THIS week my official start!)

I had a really wonderful week of running/lifting/yoga/and other cardio activities. It was wonderful being back at the gym and I am totally loving that! I don't think I can ever move to a place without a gym again. I just love all the variety of equipment and chances to change things up....besides all that, I LOVE the sauna!!! I also found these really cool logs that you can download from Body for Life and I have faithfully been writing in them all week. One is for keeping track of all of your work outs and what you lift and what intensity you ran at or whatever. The other one is a food log where you journal everything that you eat/drink and then you can get a better feel for how balanced your diet is.

I am now down to 156 which is pretty much back to square one - HOWEVER, my muscle content has grown tremendously over the past year and I think that accounts for a lot of it because my actual measurements are not far off from where I need to be. My goal is still to get down to 132, but it's a long time in coming and I'm okay with that. I am really happy with where I'm at in my life right now and I know that I am being faithful to myself and to my health by setting these goals.

It feels so good to have goals and to be faithful to my plan. I have still done really well with no sweets and chocolate. Lately we have been on a kick of making apple crisp at night, but it's just baked apples with oatmeal and nuts and spices - I don't add any sugar or butter or anything, so it's pretty healthy but gives the flavor of something sweet. I feel great and know that this is definitely a better way of life for me.

Feeling Faithful

2009-10-04T00:01:00.000-07:00

So, this has been a great week for me. I'm feeling so faithful to my program and to the possibility of eventual success! I was reading the GI Diet book this week and ironically discovered that I was already completely following this diet without even knowing it (since I have focused on a vegetarian diet.) I am still using the guidelines from the book and allowing myself to continue to eat a healthy diet and exercise accordingly.

My real successes over the past week or so have been my dedication to no sugar and chocolate. I have totally kicked my chocolate habit and also done without any sugar. I feel so much better already and think that it will really make a difference in the long run. I was so tempted by ice cream and some of the very best chocolate that were offered to me this week, but I politely declined!!! (Not like me at all.)

I am determined to get back into good shape........We hiked three days this week so that was really good and really hard + I ran three days this week.

Just staying focused and trying to make progress one day at a time......

12 Week Challenge

2009-09-22T13:37:00.000-07:00

Today I started my 12 Week Challenge. It got a little delayed since I have been so sick this week, but I felt well enough to run this morning so I kicked it off well.

Basically I'm going to follow the Body For Life fitness program that I did back in Korea - basics of running/cardio ,weight lifting, and eating healthy. Nothing really crazy, but just being dedicated and focused.

I am proud to announce that so far I have held true not only to my "No Chocolate" stance, but I have also been faithful to limiting my sweets intake. I have also been more faithful to my yoga - which I thoroughly enjoy having the privilege to do out on the front porch!!!

I don't suspect I will make any actual progress for a few weeks, but just knowing that I'm committed makes me feel good.

Goals and a New Beginning

2009-09-14T13:04:00.000-07:00

Don't dream it, do it!!! - Be Committed

My short-term goals for the next two weeks: Stick to my running program and give up all chocolate for two weeks.

My mid-term goals for the next three months: Increase my yoga to no less than four times per week and start a new weight lifting program.

My six month goals: Lose 10lbs and get my arm muscles toned back up.

My long term Year Goal: Lose 20lbs of body fat and get back the toned muscles that I desire for my all around better health.

Some changes to make in my daily diet - I am giving up chocolate for two weeks initially to kick my sugar habit and then I want to really start limiting my intake of non-neccissary sweets and snacks. Also, to help lessen cravings, I want to lower my intake of carbs (mostly breads)

I will be posting weekly in the future as best as can be - mostly just to encourage myself to stay faithful to my personal committment towards a healthier and happier life. =)

Starting Over

2009-08-29T10:27:00.000-07:00

Hey, girls!! Hope your summers all went well. It seems like everyone has been making amazing progress and I'm so proud of each of you for sticking to your plans and working out and eating right! You go girls!!

As for me, well, I had a very challenging summer. While they had promised us a full on salad bar and fruit and healthy food every day, it turns out that it was just a load of crap to get us to come out there! The food was probably some of the worst food for your body that you could eat being that everything was drenched in heavy cream etc. I did my very best to avoid most of it, but it was hard since there was nothing else to eat! They would serve us old stale food and pretend like it was great. It sucked. Anyway, needless to say that despite my very best efforts I definitely gained weight this summer - about 10 lbs!!! - I'm so sad about that because I thought I had been doing pretty well, only to come home and weigh myself and find out otherwise. How sad!!! I decided that rather than beat up on myself and feel sad and depressed I'm just going to move right on past it and start over again from the beginning.....

So, here's to new beginnings - Cheers -

This summer I did a TON of hiking and walked and ran between 5-10 miles a day. (Yes, apparently that wasn't enough!)Since we are soon to move again I feel a fresh new energy that I will be able to get back in shape in no time. I am devoted to eating totally healthy and giving up all snacks and goodies for a long time. I just want to loose some weight because I know that I have strong muscles underneath it all from all the running and abs etc. that I have been doing.

I got up at 7am nearly every morning and did a half hour ab routine with my friend Hannah and then walked a ton every day too. Plus I was running and hiking and doing yoga. I want to continue being faithful to this sort of routine, but definitely adjusting the type of food I take in. Maybe some of it has to do with hormones or getting older too? I don't know. When I look back on my summer I thought that I had really done well in spite of what we had to work with.....I guess you never really know unless you have a scale to keep track! ha.....

Anyway, that's my latest update - sorry to disappoint, but life is just like that sometimes - I WILL eventually make my goal, it's just a very LONG time in coming...Never give up, and start fresh every day! I love you girls and enjoy hearing about where you are at as well! Any suggestions for me to get this weight off would be much appreciated, but I'm just going to stick with the old fashioned "exercise and eat less" philosophy for now.....Tomorrow is a new day!

Four Month Challenge

2009-05-12T16:52:00.000-07:00

So....As I am leaving on Sunday for four months at Kennicott Glacier Lodge I wanted to wish you all a wonderful summer and a happy farewell for now.

I really don't expect to have any internet connection during my time at Kennicott and for SURE will not have a scale to keep track of progress etc.....So......As a result I decided to go on a four month challenge.....

Here's how it's gonna work. In between work hours I am committing myself to packing (hiking with between 20-40 lb backpack) hiking, walking, and running and at night I will do abs and yoga to relax. Due to the type of food available to us there I am also planning to go on an all vegetarian diet again.

We will see how my body has improved - hopefully - and whether or not I'm ready to physically handle the challenge of the long hikes in New Zealand when we leave in September!!! Here's hoping....

This past year has been HUGE for me as far as changing "on the inside" and I totally look at myself through different eyes now.....The completion of this whole journey though is to also have my outward body transformed into a healthier version of me!(The physical change has not yet happened) It's my goal and plan to really focus on getting into great physical condition while I'm away for four months - what better time to really focus on myself and get where I need to be!?

Kennicott, here I come....

New Found Commitment

2009-04-26T18:33:00.000-07:00

So, just wanted to post some of my new goals and commitments:

Definitely decided that while I've made accomplishments in the realm of running, I have done nothing by way of actually losing weight over this past year. While I really don't care that much about the actual weight lost, I do want to get in better hiking shape this summer. (And obviously it's easier to hike if you have less weight to carry around! ha) So......Off to the new training grounds I go.....

For starters my new commitment is to hike with a weight pack at least three nights per weeks. That is in addition to my running program.

Also, adding back my ab work out every other day and continuing my yoga nightly.

Biggest challenges and changes to make for me: NO MORE SUGAR!!!! Giving up chocolate and sweets except for maybe once every two weeks....GOT to cut down - I'm out of control!! Apparently I treat myself daily these days - not cool!!!!

My legs are definitely stronger (unfortunately that also has made them BIGGER so that part sucks)I feel great and I'm proud of where I've come, but now I need to set new goals and move forward!

Long Term Goal: Hike comfortably 5-6 miles with pack by September
Run 4 miles regularly for cardio work out by September
Short Term Goal: Add my ab routine into my weekly workouts and get back down to 29in waist by the end of May.

Tok Trot

2009-04-18T16:52:00.001-07:00

Pictures will come soon, but I wanted to post real quick about the race and just for a moment take time to say that I DID IT!!! It wasn't fast, it wasn't anything special, but I DID IT!!! =) The bummer was that my shins had been bothering me and my left one started hurting really bad at the 1/2 mile marker - not a good sign!! - I worked through it and the pain from that finally went away around 3 miles then came the foot pain...my right foot was hurting so bad (not sure if my shoe was tied too tight or what but my muscles on the top of my foot were NOT happy) I just kept running because I could not bare to let myself down and I refused to walk. I had convinced myself that I could finish without walking and was not about to stop! I was running so slow that at one point a guy who was "power walking" passed me!! YIKES..ha.....It was pretty funny at the time. Anyway, end of story is that I FINISHED and I am so incredibly proud of myself. My 5K time was 39 min which is about what I ran it in Korea (I think in Korea I did a 38:54) and then my 6.2 mile finish was 1:21:02 (My goal was to finish in 1:20 so I was pretty close) I thought was going to puke at the last minute so I think that's why I slowed down! ha.....So far, no vomit so all is well on that front! haha.......Now for a long shower.......Love you girls, thanks for the encouragement!!!

Training

2009-04-10T18:50:00.000-07:00

Well, this is it. It's my last official week of training before the 10K next Saturday. I'm very excited about my progress as today I ran 5 miles! (I ran the first 2.5 miles without stopping and then walked and jogged the remaining 2.5.)That's a pretty good idea of what it will be like because I plan to run the first 3.1 miles and then walk/jog the last 3.1 miles.

As I was out running today I was thinking back to where I was just 5 years ago...I stepped on the treadmill for the first time when I was living in Manhattan, KS. It was that day that I ran my first 2 minutes EVER! ha.....While I've had a lot of ups and downs and year long breaks in between I think I'm finally coming to a place where I can actually consider myself a runner. =)Today I ran for 30 minutes! While I'm still at a slow turtle speed, I'm actually enjoying the challenge and feeling great about the accomplishments I've made.

While I could easily compare myself to my many friends, both here in AK and on the web who have been so amazing at loosing weight and are just my heroes in that regard; I have to step back and take a moment to close my mind off to that possibility. The purpose of our blogs and our sharing with one another is not so that we can compare ourselves to one another; but rather that we can encourage one another and spur one another on towards becoming healthier and stronger women. Each of us does that in such a different way. For me it's definitely not through weight loss, but at the same time I'm totally happy with where I'm at because I feel like I have accomplished SOOO much over this past year. I have come a long way and it's been a struggle to get here, and I'm just glad I've made it this far! I feel happy and healthy, and strong. =)

Weight Loss: I guess a few weeks ago it was a "Fake out" because my four pounds only stayed off for like three days. My body seems to keep fluctuating between 144 and 147 lbs. Each day it is something different, so I guess as long as I stay in that range I'm making progress! ha.....

As for the detox and Bromalite. What a rip off - lucky for me I only did the free trial! ha....I have had no adverse reaction to any of it and I feel great, but definitely haven't seen any huge life altering results. No huge weight loss, no "flattening" of my belly! Nada!.....Such is life, at least maybe I have done some good for my colon!? ha

I am still doing my vitamins and stuff and that has made me feel great. Haven't had soda in over a month and am down to coffee only on occasion and not every day. Trying to give chocolate up again too - anyone want to join me on that challenge?! - I've been eating a lot of spinach and tuna and trying to make healthier adjustments all the time.

So, all in all, I'm pretty happy with the progress I've made this month. I do want to get back into my daily yoga. (I confess I've been lapsing to only a few times a week.)

Mantra: I am happy, I am healthy, I am Whole!! Consider yourself in this present moment.

Four Miles...

2009-03-27T16:41:00.000-07:00

Just wanted to post because today I ran four miles!!! The first 2+ miles I ran without stopping (25 min.) then I walked for about 10 min. and then ran the rest of the way home. I was so full of energy and felt so great and it was such an awesome day!! I'm well on my way to making it to the 5K mark before the Tok Trot on April 18th. I really want to challenge myself to do that, but at the same time not push too hard.....I definitely think I run better outside!

Also, I started my Bromalite yesterday so I'll let you guys know what I think. No problems so far....

Progress

2009-03-23T10:46:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm not entirely sure where the progress has come from, but this has been a really great week for me. I am four pounds down weighing in at 144 this morning, and I have managed to run 20 minutes straight twice this week!! (That's huge for me because my max has been 15 min...)

So, it seems that the detox is going really well, although I don't really see how taking a few vitamins and swishing around oil in your mouth for 20 minutes can really make such a big difference. I guess it just seems so simple...It would appear, however, that these few adjustments are exactly what my body needed. I feel great and really have been able to tell a difference in my body. I do have a few days here and there that I have these odd aches and pains and stuff, but I was told that it is all a part of the detox process so you just have to press on and keep being faithful to your program. I am hoping my Bromalite comes in this week because I want to give that a try too.

Mantra for the week: Be faithful to who you are at all times.

Detox

2009-03-14T12:35:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I met this new provider this week who encouraged me to do a detox (She is definitely not the first to mention this.) To really just clean my system out and see if I can better absorb vitamins. It seems that I am vitamin deficient mostly probably due to the lack of sunlight etc. She seems to think that these deficiencies have caused my kidneys and liver to not function properly thus straining my thyroid. All of this together has kind of just led to some poor health problems for me and is probably related to why after a year of working out and eating healthy I still haven't been able to lose any weight. I'm still weighing in at 148. =)

So, I'm doing a trial to see if I start feeling better and start seeing improvements to my health.......I'm trying this "oil pulling" technique with coconut oil in the mornings (look it up online if you are curious, it's pretty interesting. I will let you know what I think. So far, so good.) Drinking Psyllium Husk in the morning. Taking 10,000 IU of Vitamin D and also 2.5mg Melatonin at night. Other than that just keeping with my normal healthy diet and exercising as normal. I also signed up for a free trial of Bromalite, and will let you know what I think of that once it comes in. =)

I'll keep you posted on how I feel. It's been two days since I started it and I feel really great right now, so I guess that's good. =)

15 Degrees is Too Darn Cold...

2009-03-08T16:41:00.000-07:00

While common sense should tell ANYONE that running outside when it's 15 Degrees isn't a great idea, it seemed innocent at the time. The sun was shinning and Travis was headed out to run. Since I managed to do okay yesterday with minimal soreness it was so beautiful that I said, "You know, I think I'm gonna go for a run too."

Off I go and once again did really well for the first mile or so (Not sure the exact distance, but Travis said it's a little over a mile to the Alaskan Highway - with round trip being somewhere around 2.1 miles.) Here's the kicker....my shins and quads were sore from yesterday so I slowed down to a walk for a few minutes and then realized that it wasn't a good idea because with the sweating I had done I was now freezing! =) So, despite my discomfort I began to run again. The wind was picking up and really blowing hard (Yes, weather changes around here within minutes.) As I turned down the road to run the last quarter mile or so the wind was REALLY kicking up and I was freezing my butt off. I felt like I was running for my life! haha...Travis would definitely get a kick out of this if he were to read it (Which is why I don't let him read this blog! haha) He runs when it's 30 below and snow and ice are building on his lashes - NOT ME!!!

Anyway, I did manage to make it safely home and now am very content to be in the warmth of my cabin. =) I write this to say one real observation.....Like many things in life, sunshine can be deceptive!!!

I DID IT!!!

2009-03-07T16:10:00.000-08:00

It's Saturday and a very nice, calm 20 degrees outside. Because it's rarely this nice I decided that today I would challenge myself to run outside for the first time this winter.

I headed out in my usual gear (It's usually cold in the garage where I run, so I figured I would be good with what I usually wear.- Cotton yoga pants, a synthetic long sleeve shirt, zip up sweatshirt, and cotton gloves. To this I added a stocking cap) I took off down the road and it was SOOOOO cold. Oh my gosh, the wind was beating against my face and my eyes were watering. I was thinking, "What kind of idiot does this?" I was so tempted to turn around and head back home and hop on my treadmill. The snow was like running on a sandy beach and my feet were slipping quite a bit. I pressed on and after the first quarter mile I turned down a side road that was much better packed down. By changing directions I was sheltered from the wind and immediately warmed up. I started feeling great and just kept running. I was going at an alarmingly slow rate, and yet felt really great about where I was at. I was breathing in the fresh air, enjoying the crisp winter day and just feeling great!!! I ran the entire first mile without stopping for a moment and then continued running the mile in return with an occasional 30 sec rest. I could not believe the challenge on my lungs and muscles in my legs that I don't usually use. The most amazing part was that when I reached my front steps I felt alive and refreshed and OH SO PROUD!!! I know it's not a huge accomplishment, but I was starting to feel like I wasn't really getting anywhere with my running, and after today I know that eventually I really will be a good runner!!!

All this to say that while running in Alaska is challenging, it is not impossible!

MANTRA: Love and accept yourself in the present moment.

Reality Check

2009-03-01T19:06:00.000-08:00

Having realistic expectations is about looking at what is - not what you'd like to be - and using that information to shape and mold a positive, yet honest expectation for change. - from an article on yahoo.com that was really awesome!

It seems that lately we have all been struggling with accepting where we are at in this present moment. We are so hard on ourselves for the small indulgences and set backs - May I just take a second to say that you girls are all so amazing and I just think you are each so beautiful and special and I admire so much your dedication and motivation to strive towards living healthier and more energy filled lives!! GO GIRLS!!!

I too had a week of "straying" from my original plan!!! Sorry, Cherry, I confess that I had a few M&M's and Hershey Kisses without even realizing that I was eating chocolate!!! YIKES.......Lets see, I had fried chicken for the first time in six years, french fries, and BBQ pork!!! Again, YIKES......Those were my only real "oops" moments, oh yeah, and Tiramisu! YIKES.....haha.....Otherwise I tried to make healthy food choices while on vacation and I faithfully woke up each morning and worked out in the gym at the hotel.

Now it's back to my daily exercising, yoga, and healthy eating. Sometimes I think we just have to relax and give ourselves a break....It's only life.

While I am 10 lbs heavier than I was 7 years ago, SERIOUSLY, it was SEVEN YEARS AGO. The real question is, why compare ourselves to what we were before? Why not be grateful for the life, reality, stresses and growth that have molded us into the women we are today? I mean, why are we always looking back trying to be what we were in highschool or before children, or when we got married!? I mean, shouldn't we just be glad for those extra wrinkles, those extra rolls? I mean, isn't that due to all the hardships and life that we have experienced? Just something to ponder.......For me, when it gets down to it, I'm really happy where I'm at. I feel probably the happiest I've ever been, and I'm okay with those extra 10 lbs. Someday I hope they disapear, but for now I'm going to drink my wine and smile! haha...

Peer pressure at it's best...

2009-02-11T20:49:00.000-08:00

So, as it seems in the case of our wonderful blog-sites; peer pressure is actually benefiting us!!! I am so pleased that we have been able to encourage one another to give up "something" in dedication to each others efforts......So, in honor of Cherry and the rest of you, my "no chocolate" plan is still in motion.

Here's where I'm at today: I struggle back and forth between wanting to be something that I'm not, and just being happy with who I am.........At this point in my life I'm finally coming to a place where I can be content in this moment. It's hard because our culture teaches us that we should always be striving towards something else - being thinner, tanner, our hair should look a certian way(if it's straight, we want curly, if it's curly we want straight etc.), our clothes should be a certain brand, our makeup should always be done etc. etc. etc......If we aren't these things then we won't be loved or appreciated.........Definitely not a good mentality to have, but something that is ingrained in us as children and throughout adulthood we are forced to continue to face. I have decided that today I am NOT going to buy into that mentality. Today I'm going to be at peace with where I'm at and not expect more.

I guess some of this has come from my daily yoga practice where I have taken time out to just relax and love myself. Before everything was always so stressful and so focused on getting things "accomplished" and now I take just an hour out of my day to quiet my mind and tell myself positive things that help remind me that God created me EXACTLY the way I am and that He never intended me to be/look any differently than I am right now.

I know that I still tend to judge myself based on past pictures or weights or measurements that I once had, but each day I feel myself growing closer to finding contentment......

Mantra: Today I will love myself for the gift of life that God has given me.

Sweat More, Eat Less = More Power

2009-02-07T17:41:00.000-08:00

So, this week has been more of a relaxing week for me. I struggled through some migraines at the beginning of the week which left me weak and just not feeling well. I still did some light running and yoga, but took it kind of easy this week. Today I did a more challenging run and have gotten to the point where I can do the full 15 min. without breaking. My second 15 min. set is a little more tricky, but I'm still working on it. I have been consistently running 2+ miles so that is an improvement for me.

In April is the Tok Trot which is a traditional 10K run here in Tok. I would really love to participate this year even if I can't run the whole thing. This is my goal and I'll keep working towards it. Somehow I am very slow at progressing into a more distance runner, but eventually I will get there!

I'm still weighing in around the same, but that's totally normal for me. I'm pretty much the same weight/size that I've always been my whole life, so I've just accepted that this is where I am! Obviously I'd still love to lose another 10 lbs, but I'm okay with where I'm at and just focusing on challenging myself each week.

Since Cherry gave up chocolate for a few weeks I've decided that I'm going to try to do the same - Maybe I will be more successful knowing that someone else is doing it with me!?

Mantra for the week: Make a choice: You can either settle or sweat(I choose to sweat!)